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12 People Share The Insane Stories Of Losing Their Virginities

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Ah, young love.

I don't think anybody has a truly perfect story of how he or she lost his or her virginity. The process is always clunky and nerve-racking and usually in the back of a 2005 Ford Taurus. That's just the way it is. Like a really good chocolate dessert or any celebrity divorce, it's supposed to be messy.

That's why the geniuses of How I Lost My Vcard deserve a Nobel Prize. These stories are AGGRESSIVE as hell, but they're also clunky AF.

The big takeaway from all these is you're not alone in how you began your adult journey through the wild world of genital-to-genital playdates.

Meet the world's most confident 11-year-old.

There's nothing like spite-losing your virginity.

...and have a happy New Year!

It's always great when everything works out.

"WITH ALL THE MIGHT OF GOD."

Making. It. Work.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOALLLLLLLLLLL!!!

WHAT?! LIKE YOU DIDN'T LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY IN A WHEELCHAIR IN AN OLD AGE HOME?!

...Brian is still a virgin. Gramaglexken isn't a woman or even the name of a potential woman.

Now that's what I call *takes off sunglasses* a home run.

What's really striking me most about all these stories is how close people were to getting arrested.

He hath risen.

I hope Brian and Gramaglexken have a great life together.

Citations: This 'How I Lost My Virginity' Twitter Account Is A Treasure Trove Of Amazing Stories (BroBible)