A pivotal moment in Aly & AJ's "Potential Breakup Song" is the blistering second verse: "Now all I want is just my stuff back. / Do you get that? / Let me repeat that: / I want my stuff back." And then comes the declaration that the ex can send Aly's stuff in a box or fine, even drop it off. Because Aly? She won't be home. And that's real! Having all your ex's stuff at your place typically incites ire, annoyance, and a mountain of salt. Well, meet Roadie, a service for exchanging items post-breakup, among other things. If you'd rather eat a Tide Pod than see your ex after a breakup, a neutral third party is the best option. It'll save you the trip and the risk of being heartbroken or simply shook at seeing your ex again.
Founded in 2015, Roadie works by pairing senders with drivers who are going in the direction of the sender's destination. Jamie Gottlieb, Roadie's Content and Communications Manager, breaks it down like this. "You go online, you click 'send something,' you put in pickup location — drop-off location, details of what you’re sending — and just post on the site," she says. We match with a driver already heading that way." It's essentially Uber, but for item delivery. Through the app or via the website, Roadie facilitates deliveries for lost luggage (courtesy of a partnership with Delta), Walmart groceries orders and, if you'd like, the bomber jackets, Xbox, and Polaroids your ex left at your place.
When you sign up for a Roadie account, you can tinker with estimates for how much your delivery will cost. The final price will be based on how far your ex's belongings have to go, as well as package size. Roadie has drivers in all 50 states. So whether your ex lived in a different neighborhood or different part of the country, you can use Roadie to kiss their junk goodbye. As far as size goes, your Roadie delivery will fall into one of these categories: Fits into in a shoebox, fits in a front seat, fits in a backseat, fits a hatchback / SUV, or fits in a pickup truck. You can also send your ex's kitten in their crate!
For example, if I wanted to send back an ex's blender, candles, and books from Silver Spring, MD to Adams Morgan, Washington, D.C. — a healthy 13 stops on the Metro or 50 minutes you don't want to waste on an ex — it would cost just $12.
Gottlieb has used Roadie many times — for sweet moments, such as sending a friend some beloved cookies, and less sweet ones, including some post-ex cleanup herself. "I was dating this guy named Dmitri. I went to a trip to New York, came back. We ended up breaking up that same weekend. And he left a bunch of T-shirts and stuff at my place," Gottlieb says. "I texted him, 'Do you want your stuff?' And he says, 'No, you can keep it.'"
Despite her ex's reasoning, Gottlieb was not feeling sentimental. "I didn’t want anything to do with that," Gottlieb explains. "So I put it all in a bag, posted a delivery to Goodwill, and it was gone that same day." Gottlieb also told Elite Daily an anecdote about a former couple named Yasmin* and Jerome*. After a whirlwind engagement soured within the year, Yasmin and Jerome were faced with the tricky process of detangling their lives from one another. Faced with a bunch of university tees, rain boots, purses, and sorority merch he had no use for, Jerome looked up Roadie. "Put her stuff in a couple bags. Posted the delivery and it was gone that same day," Gottlieb says.
And just let that sink in. If you're currently feeling dread at the prospect of schlepping over to your ex's place, seeing their face, and having to present them with their stuff (or get yours back)? You don't have to. You can literally say, "Thank u, next!" in the comfort of your home and be done with your ex before happy hour starts. You'd be far from alone. Gottlieb says, "You would be surprised how often this happens in our system: we see, 'send stuff to ex' or 'broke up, need delivery.'"
Lily*, 29, recounts the less-than-pleasant mission of recovering her Harry Potter films back from an ex. He had only watched the movies because of her, anyway. "Once we had broken up, I was obviously determined to get them back. We had kept planning on meeting up but it kept getting delayed," Lily says. "Finally, on his birthday no less, he drove to my house and dropped them off."
On one hand, she was relieved to get her Harry Potter movies back — J.K. Rowling's world is a huge part of her life. She was also happy that she herself didn't have to make the trek. But it still wasn't a rainbow-and-roses type of experience. "There was definitely a whole 'neither of us want to deal with each other' vibe going on for sure. He had also mentioned he would be at my house at a certain time, but then kept delaying getting there. I knew it was his birthday so it shouldn’t have bothered me," Lily says. "But of course it did."
Even in an instance like this one, where the breakup was mutual, a traditional item exchange with an ex was awkward. Which is why Gottlieb recommends doing what she did and opting for Roadie.
"When you break up with someone, you don’t want to see them. You don’t want to talk with them. You don’t want to think about them. So, why would you want to go out of your way to drop off their stuff at their front door?" Gottlieb asks. "There’s a much easier and more seamless way to move on and find the next best thing in your life."
No breakup is going to be easy or free of emotional turmoil, and that's a fact. But it's kind of a relief knowing that you won't have to swallow an extra dose of bitterness when tying up loose ends with your ex — not if you don't want to. If you're about to hop on Roadie to post a breakup delivery, turn up Aly & AJ's seminal "Potential Breakup Song," toast this new phase of your life, and remind yourself that your ex isn't winning because they're not winning with you.
*Name has been changed.