What's the key to a happy marriage? There are plenty of theories out there. Some people say it's honesty. Others say it's constant communication. Some swear by marrying your best friend. A lot of people say it's about maintaining trust and a healthy sex drive. But one celeb couple has a very old school tip that I promise you haven't heard of before. Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban don't text and they swear that's one of the reasons behind their 12-year-long marriage.
I know, I know... I can't even fathom it either. Honestly, when I think about it, my relationship has totally been built upon a text-based foundation. Our entire courtship took place over text. Then we started dating and the texts just got more and more important. Dinner plans? We make them over text. Silently sh*t-talking people we both hate while we sit in the same room as them? OBVIOUSLY, WE DO IT OVER TEXT. Pre-emptively apologizing before an inevitable fight? Over text. Keeping in touch throughout the day when we're traveling? Over text. You get the picture. We text a lot.
But you know who doesn't text a lot? Kidman and Urban. In fact, they have literally never texted. No, seriously. “We’ve never texted,” Kidman revealed to Parade on Sunday. "That is so not our relationship."
Apparently, the couple decided to put the truly creative rule into effect when they first started dating back in 2005 and have stayed true to it ever since. It started out simply because Kidman admitted neither of them "know how to text."
But they keep the rule going because they'd rather communicate either “voice-to-voice or skin-to-skin" than shoot each other funny GIFs of Carlton dancing.
Just because they don't text doesn't mean they don't stay in touch.
“We talk all the time, and we FaceTime, but we just don’t text because I feel like texting can be misrepresentative at times,” she continued to Parade. “And I’ve had the thing where I re-read texts and I’m like, ‘What does that mean?,’ and then read it to somebody and go, ‘Can you interpret that?’ I don’t want that between my lover and I.”
But that's not Kidman's only secret to keeping her marriage to Urban, who she calls "an amazing father and a fantastic husband," alive. Although she admits they don't have a "secret," she believes genuinely enjoying each other's company helps:
We never tell anybody any advice about their relationship or think that we have a secret. We just approach it with humility and hope and just really love hanging out. I mean it’s that simple. We love spending time together. We have a lot of fun together and we just choose each other. If there is one person I can hang out with, it’s him and the girls and that’s it. That’s so much enough for me. We’ll get on planes and fly overnight rather than have a night apart.
But when you're taking those flights and doing all of those things to make your marriage work, make sure to take your health into account! Kidman advises:
We will do anything to make it work. Jetlag is always a challenge though! That’s why I think it’s so important to take time to exercise and take care of yourself because a lot of times I’m functioning on too little sleep and I’m trying to do it all, which I think is a problem for a lot of women – trying to be there and do everything for everybody at the cost and the expense of my own health and emotional health. And so I’m always trying to balance that.
OK... so the new key to a happy marriage? Have fun with each other, balance everything, and, lastly, STOP TEXTING. (But keep sexting. That's probably just fine.)
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