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Oscar Mayer Just Declared That Hot Dogs Are Sandwiches, But You Can Debate Them On It

Courtesy of Oscar Mayer

In honor of National Sandwich Day quickly approaching (mark your calendars for Nov. 3), I am going to ask you a very important question. What defines a sandwich? Is a sandwich two pieces of bread that enclose a slab of meat, or do other condiments need to be involved? What if there's no meat at all? Is it still considered a sandwich? IMHO, anything that's smushed between two buns can be called a sandwich. Now, you might be asking, "Is a hot dog a sandwich?" Oscar Mayer's hotline lets you voice your opinion on the vital matter.

FYI, I do not think a hot dog should be considered a sandwich. Sure, a hot dog is basically a meat sausage nestled between two bread slices — but hot dogs are exceptions to my sandwich rule. There's just something unsettling about calling a hot dog a sandwich — and I'd much rather call it a "snack." Apparently, Oscar Mayer disagrees. The beloved hot dog company recently declared that hot dogs are indeed sandwiches, and I'm cringing at the thought of it.

I mean, let's face it: Have you ever been at a BBQ and asked the guy at the grill for a "sandwich"? I certainly haven't.

Still, Oscar Mayer is convinced that hot dogs should be considered "sandwiches" (cringe). However, the company is giving customers the golden opportunity to prove it wrong. In order to do so, Oscar Mayer created a hotline that fans can call in effort to change its mind. The number to the hotline is 1-833-SNDWICH, and folks can start dialing on Nov. 1 at 9 a.m. ET. Don't wait too long to take your hot dog stance, though, because the hotline will only be open for 24 hours.

Since I am a strong believer that hot dogs should not be called "sandwiches," I gave the hotline a call — and I'll tell you exactly what'll happens when you pick up the phone. After dialing, you'll hear the classic "Oscar Mayer" theme song playing in the background. During the song, an angsty voice will cut into the music, screaming "hot dog, sandwich!" Then, you'll be able to leave a message stating why hot dogs shouldn't be called "sandwiches." Keep in mind that by leaving a message, you're giving the company consent to use your voice for marketing purposes. Don't worry, though — it'll stay anonymous.

Courtesy of Oscar Mayer

Now that you know what number to call, start thinking about how you're going to persuade Oscar Mayer that a hot dog isn't a sandwich. What are you going to say? What sandwich facts are you going to serve? Make sure you organize your thoughts before giving the number a ring, because this is important. Hot dogs everywhere are depending on you to save their title.

Don't procrastinate on this, though. Once you feel confident that you can persuade Oscar Mayer to change its mind, give the hotline a call. Again, you only have 24 hours to take a stance, and you can do so by calling 1-833-SNDWICH. It's time to #ChangeOscarsMind, everyone.