nude heterosexual couple looking at each other, embracing and taking shower together

Here's How To Navigate The Logistics Of Showering With Your Partner

by Ginny Hogan

Have you ever showered with a partner? I have, many times, and let's just say I sometimes leave the interaction feeling... not clean. And I don't mean because we made wild love in the shower (I don't have the balance for that, let's be real). I mean because we were a sudsy, soapy, sexy mess, and I was unable to maneuver the body wash. I know I'm not the only one who's left a shower with a partner wondering why there's conditioner on my knee, so if you're wondering about the logistics of showering with your partner, I spoke to some experts to get the deets for you.

Avoiding slippery situations is key to that shower goodness. "There's always the chance to slip and die," Rayna Greenberg and Ashley Hesseltine, relationship experts and hosts of Girls Gotta Eat podcast, tell Elite Daily. "Make sure you have some sort of non-slip tub situation because a concussion isn't worth an orgasm." I have to tell you, personally, as a woman who has had both concussions and orgasms, I can get behind that statement (though maybe I just haven't met the right orgasm yet. Or the right concussion). Get a shower mat down, or consider wearing flip-flops — anything that'll keep you on two feet, or at the very least, keep your head from crashing down. Safety is key in every sexual encounter, and knowing the risks of a slidey shower is helpful for navigating a sexy time in the tub!


It's also useful to face your body in such a way that you won't get water where you don't want it. "Face away from the showerhead so you don't get waterboarded," Greenberg and Hesseltine say. I personally love the feeling of the water spraying on the back of my neck, but less so up my nose. And the water goes both ways — it can be a hindrance but also a useful tool. You and your partner aren't the only sexy parts of the shower — the water can delight you as well if you position yourself in such a way to get it where you want it. Also, if you have an adjustable showerhead, don't be afraid to spray it on your genitalia — I've found this feels amazing. Navigate showering with your partner by ensuring you're both taking full advantage of that water pressure.

Soap can be your friend when it comes to showering with a lover. "Don't underestimate a soapy handjob," Greenberg and Hesseltine say. In fact, I've been turned on by both scrubbing and being scrubbed by a partner in the shower. It's an amazing way to get clean and erotic all at once. Take that soap, shampoo, or body wash and ask your partner what they want you to do with it! I love having clean hair, but I also love orgasms, so why not both? If you think of soap as a useful way to give a massage, then you can make sure you leave the shower feeling clean, rather than feeling like you need another shower.


There are risks to showering with a partner, and it's important to make sure you're in the right physical state. "In the case of a hangover combined with steamy temps, you could overheat and faint," Greenberg and Hesseltine say. That's not to say everyone would faint in the shower when hungover, it's just a useful piece of information to keep in mind before engaging in a sexy shower. If the hot water would be too much for you, it's always OK to say no to a shower with a partner (or to literally anything). Also, not all types of sexual interactions are equally fun in the shower. "Water negates lube," Greenberg and Hesseltine say. If lube is something that improves certain sexual activities for you, then these activities might be best done outside the shower. Additionally, shower sex still comes with the risk of STDs and pregnancy, according to Cosmopolitan. Keep in mind the risks of showering with a partner to make sure the experience is safe for both of you.

Showering with a partner can be an absolute blast (literally, if you have good enough water pressure, or, um, other kinds of pressure). Still, it's wet and slippery, and you usually don't have a ton of space, so navigating the logistics can be a bit tricky. Hopefully, this advice will help you make your shower as productive and sexy as possible! And honestly, if you're showering alone, don't be afraid to spray that water anywhere you like.