I used to think that just having a spark was enough to make a relationship last. As I get older (and, trust me, I know I'm not that old yet) I'm starting to realize that true love needs more than just a hot, heavy spark; it requires compatibility. If you're wondering how to know if you're compatible with your partner, these ladies on Reddit's AskWomen have some great tips from their own personal experience.
You just know.
I hate when people say it.. but I just know. We have very similar views of the world, values, and beliefs. We have a lot in common, our senses of humor and personalities mesh well. We have super strong chemistry, physical attraction and the sex is hot AF. In the past I've thought I was compatible with people but it was never anything like it is with my partner.
You still get butterflies around each other.
We don’t have the same personality. We have complimentary personalities. We share some hobbies (but not all of them). We have similar (but not identical) mindsets.
Things feel easy around them. They make life fun. We enjoy spending time together and want to be around each other. We share similar dreams, goals, lifestyles, and habits.
And honestly, I still get butterflies around them. Even years later. Could be a knowing smile. A new haircut. Watching them do something amazing. Still happens.
You feel like you've known each other for ages.
Even our first dates we didn’t feel the need to try very hard to impress each other. Being together was easy and natural. We knew what each other liked and wanted without really knowing each other.
You don't fight often.
we rarely fight, and we are both committed to making each other happy. we both have similar ideas of how much time we want to spend with each other (a lot haha), and at least some of the ways we enjoy spending time overlap. we have some incompatibilities, as will anyone, but really it's our commitment to make it work anyway that makes me feel like it's worth it.
You feel a totally unique bond with them.
Personally, it's because I haven't bonded with anyone before, ever. Not even my parents, not even "friends" from school, never really had crushes before him ... so he must be quite special.
You feel an immediate sense of comfort around them.
We were comfortable with each other almost immediately, we agree on almost all “big issues”, we both have a very dark/sarcastic sense of humor which not everyone likes, and also like others have said, you just “know”. It was so easy to see myself spending the rest of my life with him because once we were together, I didn’t think about my life in any way other than being shared with him. Plus the sex is very very good. +1 for that, for sure.
You compliment each other.
We get along ridiculously well. We have a good amount in common but we also have a LOT that we don't have in common. We're different in complimentary ways. Plus there's just this tugging feeling at the heart.
You totally understand each other.
Everything is just so ... easy. We get each other's jokes. We understand each others' moods and know how to respond to said moods. It's just so easy to be myself around him and I think he'd say the same thing. I always thought relationships were hard work. But this - this is like puzzle pieces that just fit together. We've had some bumps but they were minor and it's just as easy and natural as breathing air.
You're always a team.
Because even during the lulls, or the insanely busy not-fun times, we are still a solid team and work together versus against each other.
You click on multiple levels.
We just click on every level. It's hard to describe. Like I finally found someone else who operates on my wavelength. After just a few weeks of dating, I felt like he understood me better than most of my friends/family.
You enjoy every moment together, even the not-so-great ones.
Communication doesn’t feel like a chore. Even difficult relationship stuff is easier than you anticipated.
Still wondering if you and your partner are compatible? At the end of the day, I promise you'll know in your gut. Just find a way to get in touch with it.
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