They say when it comes to love, you know when you know. The real deal just feels different. It's so exciting, but also a little bit scary because it means your heart is truly vulnerable. It's even more scary if you can really see a future with this person. Maybe you haven't really discussed what the next 10 years look like, but that's OK, because the only real way to know if your partner will love you forever is in the way they behave toward you — and, even more importantly, in how they treat you.
What can make this tricky is that there are a lot of behaviors that may seem like forever love at first, but aren't. For one thing, you should always be wary of anyone who tries to love-bomb you right away, says matchmaking and dating expert Stef Safran, because if "someone tries too hard to and comes on too strong, this could be a sign you are dealing with a narcissist."
And of course, there’s the sign of what we think is forever love we’ve all fallen prey to: white-hot sexual chemistry. "One thing sexual chemistry does is build intimacy and nakedness (in the most literal sense)," Michal Naisteter, matchmaker at Three Day Rule, tells Elite Daily. She also added that intimacy is not the same thing as love.
So then, what does "forever love" behavior actually look like? Here's what behaviors the experts say you should be looking out for to know if your partner is truly in it for the long haul.
Have you already met all of their friend group? That’s a good sign that they love you, Diana Dorell, an intuitive dating coach and author of The Dating Mirror: Trust Again, Love Again, tells Elite Daily. The reason this matters is because we care deeply about our friends and trust their judgment (usually). Plus, if they want to show you off to their friends, that’s a sign that they are proud to be with you.
When you really love someone, it’s just natural to see them as a priority in your life. Dorell says that if your SO always makes time for you, especially when they're really busy, it's a good sign that you have a true love connection that'll last forever.
The people we love are the people we rely on most and whose judgment and opinions we value. So, if your partner regularly "asks for your suggestions on advice and includes you in important decisions in their life," that's a clear sign of love, says Dorrell.
How selfish is your partner when it comes to whose needs are prioritized? If "you feel that you can count on them to take what you want into consideration and you feel that they care a lot about your needs, even more so than theirs," then Safran says it's forever love.
Someone who loves you and wants you in their life includes you in their future plans, even the small ones. "Whether it's a wedding, a family party, or just a trip with you, it's all about planning to build on your life together," says Safran.
If your partner is always breaking promises, that's not a great sign in regard to how they feel about you. "When someone cares about what you think of them, they make sure that their promises to you matter," explains Safran. Besides, who wants to be with someone who you can't count on to keep their word?
A loving partner is going to be tuned into your needs and wants, and part of that is knowing how you prefer to be touched and shown affection. "A person who’s in love will touch their partner in a way that feels good to the other person — by listening to what they like and watching their response," says Naisteter. "If you are in love, that feedback cycle with your partner and their response is what will show their investment in you and your pleasure."
Can you always count on your partner, even if it requires them to make sacrifices? If the answer is yes, that's a good sign that they are really in love with you. "When you fall in love, you don't necessarily push away all responsibilities, but you definitely offer to help your other without any shred of discomfort," says Naisteter.
Ultimately, the best way to know if you and your partner's love will last forever is to observe if they're treating you the same way you treat them. You are your best example of what love looks like, and if they mirror that love, you might just have found your person.
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