Relationships
15 Women Share How Their Lives Changed When They Met "The One"
by Candice Jalili
We've all heard of "The One." That one, rom-com-worthy, special person who sweeps you off your feet. But how does life change when you meet 'The One"? What makes life with "The One" by your side different than life before? In a recent Reddit AskWomen thread, ladies shared how meeting "The One" changed their lives for the better.
She finally felt as though she was getting the love she deserved.
I finally felt like my feelings of knowing that I deserved love and happiness were finally real. I knew he was out there but i was starting to give up hope. Im glad i didnt.Ive lacked confidence all my life because I was told quite often I was something less than I really felt about myself, I started to believe it all. When I met him he just saw past my flaws and just truly cared about me. He loved me for me. Its been 3 years and basically all we do is laugh and make jokes, we hardly ever argue. I wouldn’t even call our arguments, arguments. They’re more like disagreements that we talk about and come to an understanding about. With all my past relationships there were a ton of heated fights, sometimes several times a day, sometimes they would last for weeks. I would be made to seem like I was the crazy one even though I knew in my heart I wasn’t.I just feel utterly complete now. God i cant wait to marry him and grow old with him. He is my best friend and I want no other. I don’t look at other guys wondering and hoping if maybe he’s the one because I have him now.
She realized her past relationships were toxic.
It change how I felt towards relationships completely. Prior to the right one, I always felt like what I asked for in a relationship was too much. I felt like I was the problem. I was the one who created arguments for no reason. I felt like there was something wrong with me for putting so much into a relationship, yet never getting it back in the same way. I now realize and see that my past relationships were gas lighting me. My current relationship isn't hard. I feel at my happiest when I am around him. I don't have sleeping issues anymore.
She's no longer anxious.
It's still very very new and I don't want to jinx it, but he doesn't give me anxiety. It's a new feeling to be stress free. Maybe it's me trying to be level headed and practical or maybe it's our chemistry. Taking one day at a time I guess.
She's having fun.
Just lovely. Stress free, relaxed, it’s all okay. It’s just very fun.However I didn’t really meet him until that common phrase “I was ready to meet him”. I think I dated awful people before because I think I just needed to in a way, to learn how awful relationships could be, and therefore know also how wonderful they can be. If I met this guy earlier my childish side would have definitely taken his kindness and compassion for granted. 100%. So I am happy for the assh*les in hindsight.Just added that last bit so people know it’s not all for nothing in the long run.
She learned it's possible to be accepted wholly.
Before I met my boyfriend, I always thought people had to give something up to make it work. A part from themselves, like a little sacrifice. I am not only talking about relationships but also friendships and any kind of human connection and interaction.It was huge for me to meet someone who would take me exactly the way I am and not feeling entitled to expect or want something. I can be myself. A no gets respected, I never get pushed. I don't feel like I've sacrificed any part of me for him, we just work perfectly together, each is their own. And he does so many little things that show me every day how much he loves me. I never met a better person than him and I want to show him how much I love him every day too. It's wonderful and I just know he's the one.Right now I am so happy. But because he showed me that the right people should accept you 100% the way you are as long as you do the same, I'm starting to question a few "friends".
She felt seen for the first time.
With previous partners I always felt a bit stuck in a box, like they only saw a few aspects of who I was and chose to ignore the rest. When I met my husband, for the first time I felt seen. He saw every little part of me and loved it all, I never felt like I had to hide parts of myself. It was incredibly liberating and has helped me grow into my own person.
Life without him is a blur.
I legitimately can’t remember what life was like without him. As soon as he stepped into my life it felt like he had always been there. It was like the missing puzzle piece. As if every other guy was “practice” for when I finally met him, so that I would be “as good” of a person as I needed to be to keep him (and deserve him)I feel like my life is finally “on track” and that I’m moving towards that steady, normal, happy, life I’ve always wanted. I feel like we are a team and we are both meeting goals that we had long past given hope of ever meeting.It feels, oddly, like I’m finally an adult lol
She was at peace.
It was a liberating feeling, almost. I was just so much at peace, and so excited to build our life together. And it’s not always been like that — we’ve had a lot of challenges as well — but I still do feel that sense of being at peace with my life, finally.
She was confused and happy at the same time.
I found myself both truly and wholly happy and very very confused. I relate to everything here about feeling loved, and validated and relieved. But I was also so caught in toxic cycles my entire life that when things changed I had to learn. I learned to be vulnerable, to give the benefit of the doubt, and to stop looking over my shoulder. I am still practicing these things.
I’ve thought about this a lot, what was it about my husband that made me want to marry him and not anyone else. Apart from all the little things about him and our compatibility I think I’ve narrowed it down to comfort. I was extremely comfortable with him right from the beginning and I still am 5 years later. It’s the feeling that whatever happens, he will be there. Whoever I become will be because he allows me to be anything. We bicker and joke but ultimately we never judge each other. It’s freeing and safe. I never felt supported before so it allows me to dream big and take risks in life. Whether they pay off or not, I know I’ll have him by my side.
Life is more carefree.
Life just became so easy. When I met my now husband, it was the first time that I didn’t feel like I had to walk on egg shells around someone (I dated some pretty miserable dudes who all wanted me to be miserable too). It was the first time that I felt like someone truly LIKED me and that’s a very comforting feeling. He’s just the best and I still don’t know how I snagged him most days.
Everything was just easier.
It’s easy. I was shocked by how easy it was. Easy to talk, easy to make plans. Easy to express fears and desires. I don’t know if hes the “right” person forever, but he’s definitely the right person right now.
Everything clicked.
It just worked. Somehow, when I met my husband, everything just clicked. There was no compromising or swallowing my doubts or trying to make something work that clearly wasn't. It just clicked and worked perfectly from the beginning, without much effort.Of course, as the relationship progressed and we got married, we've struggled with stuff all couples do, but it never feels like tension between us, it always feels like obstacles we work together to deal with.
She feels like she can be herself.
Been together for almost two years now, it’ll be two years next month. We met on Tinder.I’ve always wanted an equal partner, and I feel like I have that now. I’m still hesitant to voice my needs (an insecurity from previous relationships; fearing I’ll be seen as needy), but he always assured me that my feelings and needs are valid.My friends also love him. They see how he is with me, and how loving and caring he is. They always got bad vibes from everyone else, but not from him. He also doesn’t put up a fuss about hanging out with my friends.He makes me feel safe and loved. He’s incredibly supportive, too. As an anxious person, I can relax with him. I feel like I can be myself.
Her life now is pure bliss.
I finally had to stop dating so I could work on myself. ..I finally got to a point where I valued my alone time and being single. .then we reconnected and it was like fate. We both are still so surprised how it all worked out. We knew eachother when we were young teens and were best friends, he moved away and we didn't talk for years then about 14 years later I found him on social media, we started talking and a week later dating, 3 month later living together.It's wierd how perfect it all is. He treats me like an equal, with respect. I can see the love he has for me in his eyes, actions, and words. He is gentle and understanding. After being abused, manipulated, controlled, and treated like a thing not a person. ...this is bliss.
The main takeaway here? The right relationship will be easy. It won't stress you out or make you upset. All it will do is make your life better.
