Your early 20s are most likely filled with adventure, fun, work and everything else you can fit into your schedule and budget. As you start your career and get into this whole adulting thing, you're might also be dating up a storm. Although everyone's experience is different, there are certain types of people you date in your early 20s that are fairly universal, and each type of person you date will affect your life and your life's trajectory in some way. Even the relationships that fail still offer you a gift of experience, a broadened perspective, or at the very least, a great story.
In my early 20s, I was working my first full-time job, paying for my own rent, and living without a roommate. I felt like the most adulty adult out there, and so it's not surprising that I briefly dated an older guy. He was the next logical piece of evidence I could present to the world to prove that I had my sh*t together. If a successful man in his 30s wanted to be in a relationship with me, well then, wasn't I mature, intelligent, and officially grown up? Nope! It didn't take me long to realize that he was interested in me as more of an ornament, not a serious partner. So I moved on, and on, and on! And that's the beauty of your 20s — it's a time of exploration and adventure, so if you find yourself dating one of these personality types, enjoy the ride.
As a fresh new adult figuring out how to function in the world, the appeal of an older partner can sweep you off your feet. An older suitor also offers experiences that are interesting and appealing — like, who wouldn't want to take a weekend trip to go wine-tasting at their favorite winery? In addition to broader perspectives and deeper pockets, dating someone who is older than you are can also make you feel really special. Your youth feels like a different type of currency, but you're also able to connect on an intellectual level, which can be a huge ego boost.
This person has their eyes on the prize, and sorry, but that prize is not you. This one wants the promotion, the corner office, and the pay raise. Being around someone so driven is really attractive, especially as you're starting to focus on the foundation of your own career. While this charming workaholic has the funds for fun dates and nice dinners, they also have limited free time for those fun dates and nice dinners. But their ambition is impressive, it inspires your competitive spirit, and if you date a workaholic, you'll simultaneously be enrolled in Work/Life Balance 101.
This person was the life of the party in college, and they're not giving up that title any time soon. While they're always out on the town, always know where the party is, and always remember what the doorman's name is, keeping up with this person can almost be a full-time job. But you're in your 20s! You don't need to settle down right now, so this person is great to date... for now. While you'll probably need to prioritize work and get some sleep eventually, don't worry about that right now — go have fun with your party-hardy sweetheart.
This person is great at being in relationships... because they were just in one. We've all known a rebounder or been on the rebound ourselves, and finding the immediate comfort of another person can sometimes help you heal from your past relationship. A lot of people in their early 20s are just out of their college relationships, so this rebounder might be figuring out what dating as a single adult is actually all about. So, while a rebounder is probably going to be great about calling you back and making plans, just don't set your heart on any really long-term plans unless you both have a serious conversation about what you're each looking for.
Let's say you've been friends with this person for years and one day, you look at each other and things just feel different. You both feel it and you decide to give dating a shot. This is totally understandable because your life is changing a lot right now. Your priorities might be shifting from play to work, your job itself might be changing, and most importantly, you're changing a lot. So it makes sense that your friendship might change into something more.
You're focusing on your career, maybe landing that perfect job, or working up to your dream career step by step. Along the way, you'll form professional relationships with your co-workers, and perhaps one night after work, you'll grab drinks and suddenly look at one of them in a new light. Office romances are tricky to navigate, which can make them even more exciting and thrilling. You and your co-worker date already have tons in common, you already know a lot about each other, so a lot of the ground work is already done. You might eventually tire of seeing your partner at home and at work, but in the meantime, when you complain about your boss, you know your partner will truly understand.
Ah, getting a visit from the ghost of relationships past! Let's say you dated this person in high school or college and things didn't work out, but now that you're in your 20s, maybe things will be different! There's a nice familiarity about this person, but there's also new things to be discovered. You have history together and now you get to make new memories. Perhaps the timing just wasn't right earlier, but either way, it's pretty likely you might give an ex just one more shot now that you're both a little bit older and (hopefully) wiser.
You might find yourself drawn to this person because you have a lot in common right now — like maybe similar schedule, you live near each other, and you both want a relationship. There's a lot of great things about this person and you're happy with them... for now. They're nice, you have the same interests, and maybe even share a friend group, but if you're being truly honest, you don't think they're the one. And that's absolutely fine. Some relationships serve you in the moment and give you what you need at a certain phase of your life, and in this particular season, this person is the perfect fit.
This person is passionate about every cause, attends every march, and never seems to run out of energy. Their compassion is very attractive, and teaming up with this person makes you feel like you two can truly change the world for the better. When the reality of being an adult in your early 20s hits you in the form of rent, taxes, and the daily grind of Monday through Friday employment, dating a serial do-gooder might just refresh your energy and optimism about the world.
Your early 20s are amazing years that are going to be filled with highs, lows, and everything in between. Whether you go through a party phase or a workaholic phase, dating different types of people will not only be an adventure, it will also help you figure out what kind of person you are.
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