8 Times You Shouldn't Listen To Your Friends, Because Their Advice Isn't Sincere
Where would we be without advice? We don't always have the right answers, and that's why looking for guidance and opinions from others is simply part of life. Open to receiving advice from your friends should be second-nature, but you should also know when your friend isn't handing you meaningful or genuine advice. It'd be nice if shadows were the only things that were shady, but friends tend to fall in that category sometimes as well. Their hearts aren't always in the right place, and you'll have to pick up on times you shouldn't listen to your friends before you get hurt in the process.
There's no need to become super anti-social or anything, but certain circumstances will shape a friend's potential and ability to give you horrible advice. You don't expect it from close friends, but if they're making things messy because of their own agenda, it may be time to reevaluate that friendship. It's not always easy to catch, but there are situations you should keep in mind before you accept any flimsy advice from them. Every scenario varies, but there are general ballpark reasons you should think twice about before considering whether or not to listen to a friend.
1. They Know Little To Nothing About The Situation
If your friend hasn't even taken it upon themselves to hear everything about your current dilemma, how can you trust that their advice is valid? If anything, their advice is going to be one-sided and uninformed. They should want to know all of the facts before they give their opinion on what you should do.
2. They Don't Like Your Boyfriend, But It's Not Really Him
Relationship advice should never be taken if your friend blatantly doesn't like your boyfriend for no reason at all. If that's the case, they might be jealous of your relationship and have sabotage on their mind. Besides, if bae has tried so hard for your friend to like him and it's still a no-go, something's definitely up.
3. Their Advice Seems Rushed And Instantaneous
Seeking out advice means you've tried looking at the situation in several different ways and are still lost. That takes time. Your friend shouldn't have a quick fix attitude whenever they deliver advice. Rushed "help" is a sign that they aren't really interested in getting you to the best possible result.
4. They Don't Like Your Other Group Of Friends
Your other group of friends might seem like a threat to them. Therefore, their advice always manages to be against them or would somehow distance you from your other group of friends. They're operating toward their own ill-will, and that makes their advice pretty salty.
5. You Know That They Wouldn't Even Take Their Own Advice
If your friend is saying something so outlandish and self-sacrificing that it makes you wonder if they would even do it themselves, chances are, it's shallow advice and really isn't coming from anywhere concrete. They're sort of empty words that have no validation because they wouldn't take their own advice. If they wouldn't do it, why should you?
6. They're Not Keeping Your Best Interests In Mind
Your friend should know what's important to you and that any decision you make has your values and beliefs embedded in it. Advice that totally goes against what you believe in, is no good advice. It should also make you think twice about how much your friend really actually knows you and cares about you.
7. Somehow, Their Advice For You Revolves Around Them
When your friend is just waiting for their chance to speak, and their "advice" manages to circle back to them — don't take the advice. You need advice for what you're dealing with, and it should in no way be all about them. You deserve someone who is going to listen and give you the center stage to voice your frustrations, because that's what you need at the time.
8. You're Genuinely Against Everything They've Said
Normally, even if you don't take all of your friends advice, you find little gems in what they said and take it into consideration. If there isn't one sincere or beneficial thing you can grasp from their so-called "advice," you probably wasted your time asking. Not all advice is good advice, even if the person has a welcoming smile on their face when they're delivering it.
You may not always have the answers, but asking for advice should come with something genuine in return. Your real friends know that.