If you've ever slid into someone's DMs, you know it's more challenging than it looks. For one, you have to come up with something clever, witty, or engaging to say. The best lines to use when sliding into DMs are cool and collected, but playful enough to be read as flirty. In order to ensure a slam dunk (or a decent shot), it helps to assess whether this IRL friend or internet mutual has been vibing on you as well. If you feel like your crush has been flirting back or dropping hints about wanting to date you, test the waters with a flirty DM slide.
Sexologist and intimacy expert Shan Boodram uses a poker analogy: "Put some of your chips down — make a small move — and wait," Boodram tells Elite Daily. Make small, incremental steps to build intimacy. Although that's typically the protocol IRL, this applies to digital flirting, too.
"You don't wanna be that person who goes full speed ahead only to look back and see the other person wasn't remotely interested in going that way with you," Boodram explains. "[For example, like] sending a d*ck pic out of the blue." Here are some totally chill, completely respectful, but still flirty ways to slide into your crush's DMs.
- "Your food pics are always [chef's kiss]. Where's the best place to go around here?" An alternate ending: "What's your go-to recipe?"
- "OK, but what's the best pasta you've ever had?"
- "I see that you're on the rollerblading wave! That looks so fun."
- "Your travel throwbacks are gorgeous. Got any big post-COVID trips in mind?"
- "Oh, I see that you're reading [insert TV show here]. Should I get into it?"
- "I've been peeping the books you've been reading and you have great taste. What's your favorite book?"
- "IDK if you've noticed, but I'm def crushing on you."
- "I see you've been double-tapping all my pics recently. Care to comment?"
- "If you like all my pictures so much, then you should see my number."
- "You literally look so good in all your pics. What's your secret?"
- "I feel like I've been picking up on some flirty vibes between us lately..."
- "You hitting me up the other day has sparked my curiosity."
- "We've been mutuals for a bit and I've been wanting to say 'hi.' So hi!"
- "You know, I like talking to you, and I'd like to get to know you better."
- "I def miss when we used to hang out. Meet up soon?"
- "I just saw [XYZ thing] and it made me think of you."
- Just type "YOU" and send your crush a meme. If you're feeling bold, send them a wholesome meme about crushing or dating. They'll get the message.
- "Your puppy is *so* cute. How long have you had them?"
- "Do you think asking someone out in the DMs is cool or not? Asking for a friend."
- "I just want to say that I think you're great!"
- "I love all the songs you've been posting in your Story. What are you listening to right now?"
- "You have the best music taste and I kinda want to go the record store with you."
- "I heard [insert an artist that you both love] is going on tour next year. Wanna go with me?"
Sliding into a crush's DMs can be scary. But no matter the outcome, it can be a great teachable moment as you master the art of flirting efficiently and respectfully. As Boodram says, "Healthy intimacy is taking one small step, seeing if that person takes that step with you, and then waiting to see if they take the lead next."