20 Worst Excuses For Cheating That Real People Actually Gave Their Partners Will Make You Scream
This is definitely not always the case, but sometimes, people really do have valid excuses for cheating on their partners — maybe there was an issue in the relationship, or maybe they were dealing with their own personal issues. Other times, the excuses are... well, they're not great. Specifically, a recent Reddit AskWomen thread had ladies share the worst excuses for cheating they've ever gotten from their partners. And, oh man. We have 20 of the worst ones here for you and they are so incredibly cringeworthy, you guys.
What makes them so bad, you ask? Each and every one of them manage to add insult to injury in some way, shape or form. Let's face it: finding out you've been cheated on already sucks. The last thing you want is to be kicked by the same person who pushed you down to the ground in the first place. These cheaters did exactly that. Some of them made ridiculous attempts to shift the blame back over to their partners, claiming it was somehow their fault they cheated. Others simply offered up lies that were so dumb, it was actually insulting to their partner's intelligence. Read along and prepare to roll your eyes.
Her Shower Was Broken, So He Had No Choice But To Let Her Use His
"her shower wasn't working" so he proceeded to invite her over to shower together, they also f*cked out of the shower and hooked up a number of times but that was just his excuse
They Kept It A Secret To Spare Her Feelings
“I didn’t tell you about this because I was worried you would get upset”
They Claimed The Hickey Was A Shaving Injury
"There is a f*cking hickey on your neck? Are you 13?"
"Oh, I did that shaving."
"Really. And you expect me to buy that bullsh*t?"
He Claimed He Was Just Doing A Test Run For Their Threesome
"We were planning a threesome as a surprise for you and decided to test it first"
He knew I wasn't into other girls... But boy, he was.
He Was Jealous Of Her Dog
"I was falling in love with you too fast, I needed to do something to slow it down a little" after I found out he was cheating on me with my cousin (who lived with us at the time and who was like my sister). From the same guy: "I was jealous of how much time you spent with your dog" because at around the same time I got an English Bulldog puppy and I wanted to spend time with him for the first few months training him.
They Tried To Turn It On Her In The Lamest Way Possible
"But you were at Disneyland! You could have cheated on me there! "
I went with my mom and aunt. To Disneyland.
He Was Just Trying To Take A Quick Trip To The Future
“I wanted to see what our future was like. She was an older less attractive version of you”
He Said It Didn't Count Because He Was Gonna Dump Her Anyway
"It's not cheating because I was already planning to break up with you."
Okay, but you didn't so it was...
He Tried To Make It Romantic
I was on vacation, you're the one I want to come home to.
He Pulled A Shaggy And Said It Wasn't Him
Found a stack of Polaroid photos of him f*cking other people in his sock drawer while putting away his laundry, all of them dated since we started dating.
"It wasn't me!"
Featured in them was the tattoo he got on our second date.
He Legit Said The Other Woman Reminded Him Of A Younger Version Of Her
"She reminded me of a younger version of you, and the way you used to be."
I was 20, he was 25, we'd been dating since I was 18.
They Said It Was Really Just A Matter Of Honoring Their Plans
"We weren't together yet when I promised to have sex with her, you can't expect me to back out just because we're dating now. Maybe we shouldn't be together at all if you're expecting me to just drop my plans like this."
Let me tell you, I was a STUPID STUPID 22 year old.
They Pretty Much Said They Had No Choice
"Well I asked you if I could sleep with her! You said no, what was I supposed to do?"
He Turned It Around On Her In The Most Diabolical Way
His drunk a** fell asleep so I went through his phone because I'd suspected he was cheating for a couple months..this chick claimed she had a yeast infection and he still wanted to bang her.."you should get some condoms because if she gets a yeast infection, she'll know what's up". Then when I confronted him with his phone in my hand, he said they had set up that conversation on purpose to prove I was looking through his phone 🤦♀️
They Said It Was Just A Bet
My friend said that I couldn’t do it so I proved him wrong.
He Claimed She Wasn't Satisfying Him Sexually
“I cheated on you because you just weren’t giving me what I wanted, sexually. Your parents were always around, her parents are chill. Sorry, babe. Put out for the next guy.”
I was 16. It was a long distance relationship, he lived the next state over. When I visited him, my parents didn’t trust a teenage girl being in a hotel room with her teenage boyfriend.
Also, a woman’s worth isn’t based on if she “puts out.” Relationships shouldn’t just be based on sex.
He Said He Was Really Just Trying To Help Her Out — No, Seriously
He cheated with my friend, said it was my fault, said he was trying to be thoughtful and 'give me a break' since I was in a minor accident. Said he thought I'd be ok with it since I knew her and knew she was clean.
He Told Her It Was His Form Of Escape
My ex decided to tell me that it was some form of escape when we argue, so that he can pretend to be someone else and feel good about himself. He made it seem like some sort of disassociation trip.
I love when they try to make you feel guilty for their cheating.
The Timing Was Awful
I used the condom to masterbate. After I found 2 Trojans in the center console of our truck and asked where the 3rd was when I came home from my baby shower.
He Said He "Forgot" To Tell Her About His Other Girlfriend
"I'm sorry, forgot to tell you."
He had been dating this girl for three months, changed his Facebook status to say they were dating, all of our friends assumed we'd just broken up and didn't want to get involved or bring it up since I "seemed to be handling the breakup well."
Nope. We'd been lovey dovey kissy and I'd had no clue til I finally logged into my Facebook and was confronted with it. (I rarely use Facebook.)
Oh god. These were rough. If you're going to cheat, do yourself and your partner a favor and at least have a better excuse than these people. Or hey! Here's a thought. Maybe just be honest about it.