When it comes to dating, everyone has some sort of deal-breaker. If you're sitting there thinking you're an exception to this rule just wait it out. You'll find out your dating deal-breaker in due time. For me, it's bailing. I cannot stand people who bail on plans. I think it's totally rude and completely unacceptable. For my best friend, it's guys with dirty finger nails... which, TBH, I might have to add to my list also because, well, ew. Want to hear some more? You're in luck! In a recent Reddit thread, women reveal their dating dealbreakers and I have their best responses here for you.
Complainers. If you constantly complain about every little thing, then it's gonna be a no from me.
Quick to anger.
I've dealt with enough anger problems in my life. I need someone who is mellow at heart.
When they dominate every conversation and don't know how to reciprocate when I say something or need support. I'm your partner, not your therapist - when I want to talk about That Traumatic Thing on a bad day, the bare minimum I expect is that you listen and are kind. Not, you know...immediately relate my experience to some arbitrary thing you read about or experienced secondhand, as a segue into something else about yourself.
I keep ending up with guys who can’t handle it when I’m having a sh*tty/insecure/pessimistic day. “Stop being negative, think positive!” is not real emotional support, no matter how well intentioned. It’s like they’ve never fought a personal demon before.
Lack of personal hygiene.
If they are rude to customer service workers like bartenders, waiters or store assistants. I was given that advice by a lady old enough to be my grandmother when I was sixteen years old and never forgotten it.
She said no matter how nice he (or she) is to you, if they are rude to the waiter then RUN! Once the honeymoon period is over he will talk to you like that. Or his rudeness will rub off on you and you will become that person too, which goes hugely against my morals.
This is a deal-breaker for me, even with friends, not just dating. The way a person treats a customer service worker reveals a hell of a lot about their true character. If they treat those workers like shit - RUN!
Smoking and learned helplessness.
No motivation or ambitiousness career-wise, inability to think critically or debate properly, needs constant validation from me, victim mentality on circumstances
I'm tired of always being the adult.
Being Sworn at / screamed/ yelled at in fights. We're both adults. We can talk like normal adults about things that bug us.
At this point in my life, outside of smoking, a guy who thinks cool indifference is the way to handle life. It's a mask. It also tells me he isn't in touch with his emotions enough to feel confident expressing them. So, no thanks. That's fucking exhausting.
Inability to take care of themselves/do chores, not wanting kids, not wanting to get married, smoking, conservative political views, being a picky eater.
Having children under 15 or wanting children.
Being heavily religious. I've no problem with religion or religious people, but I wouldn't be able to share an incredibly important part of their life with them. Also, I'm sure much of who I am and what I do would rub them the wrong way, depending on the religion.
I think if they trash talk an ex on the first date. You really shouldn't be talking shit about an ex to a new potential partner.'All I attract is crazy' yeah no, maybe the issue might be you.
alcoholism or even a hint that he might have an alcohol problem and I'm outta there. I lived with an alcoholic in my early 20s and told myself never again. I'd rather be happy alone than miserable with someone.
Non communication and mind games. If you want something, just tell me. I don't know how to read between lines and I will take everything you say at face value.
Some of those dealbreakers may have sounded a little discouraging for those of you bailers/smokers/children lovers etc. I get that. But, as always, there is a silver lining to all of this.
As you may have learned from your time here on Earth, human beings are vastly different from one another. While one of the Reddit users admitted wanting kids would be a total dealbreaker for her, not wanting kids would be a total dealbreaker for me! The point is that there's someone out there for everyone. One person's dealbreaker is another person's treasure. Unless you're mean to waiters. In that case, I would strongly suggest changing your ways.
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