10 Red Flags The Person You're Dating Is Actually Awful, From Women Who Have Been There

by Candice Jalili

Love is wonderful for many reasons. It makes you feel what seems like a drug-induced high, but at the same time, it makes you feel totally safe and comforted. And even then, it also terrifies you in a strangely exhilarating way. But unfortunately, being in love has its downsides, too. What could possibly be the downside of such a magical thing? Well, not to sound like a 1980s love song, but love really does have a tendency to make people blind. There are all sorts of red flags you're dating a loser that easily go unnoticed by so many people. And unfortunately, those people waste a ton of time in a relationship that serves no benefit to them at all.

This experience is really a lot more common than you think it is. In a recent Reddit thread, the women below shared the exact moment their love goggles wore off, and they realized the people they were dating were actually losers.

Her SO got mad at her for getting sick.

I think the moment that I knew it was definitely over was when I was puking in the toilet and trying to fend my curious just-walking toddler away. He came home from work and I was so relieved, thinking thank God finally he's here and can take care of me/watch the baby. But no - the first thing he did was come up the stairs and shout at me because apparently it was my fault I was sick and now I had definitely made the baby sick too and he was mad about it.
Um. Okay.


Her partner got jealous of her ex for showing up at her dad's funeral.

When he told me how upset he was that my ex and long time friend came to my father's funeral to support me because it was 'disrespectful and upsetting' to him.


Her boyfriend asked her to pay him back for the NyQuil he got her when she was ill.

I didn't leave at this point, but I think the straw that really changed the way I thought and felt about him was about a month or two into us living together. I was ridiculously sick and he offered to go buy me some medicine. He came back with a bottle of Dayquil and a bottle of Nyquil, handed them to me with a smile and said, 'I'll just add the total for those to what you already owe me.'


It took meeting another guy to make this woman see the light.

This might get me downvoted to hell, but: I fell for another guy. My now-ex was unhygenic, was silent or rude in most group social situations, had been failing his classes, staying up all night playing RPGs, made me feel guilty every time I wanted to hang out with my friends or wear makeup, and yelled at me frequently. I didn't realize he was being controlling; I thought I was being a good girlfriend by calming his anxieties and doing everything he wanted.I didn't realize how bad my relationship was until I met someone who treated me with respect and who actually took care of himself. I broke up with my now-ex pretty quickly, but he still hates me for developing feelings for the new guy.


Her SO started drinking first thing in the morning.

He cracked open a Bud Light at 8 am


She and her boyfriend were just... not on the same level.

I was dating this guy and he treated me really well but he was definitely going no where in life. He was really bad with money and disorganized, unhealthy and unhygienic. His own grandmother asked me why an attractive, educated young woman like me was interested in him. That was pretty funny, but sad too. In the end I just got tired of it all.


She found out he was jerking it to pics of his female friends.

When I found out about his lovely collection of his female friends' photos screenshotted from instagram for his spank bank


Her SO called her mean names.

The name calling. I put up with the arguing, hoping it would get better but being called a "slut" and a "fatass" really changes your opinion of someone. I left not too long after all of that and met my current wonderful boyfriend less than a month after. Everything has been looking up since I ditched that loser.


Her partner told her to "get over" her dad's death.

My dad died, and about 3 months later he said to me (when I was crying):
"It's been MONTHS can't you get over it already?"


Her boyfriend was talking about her behind her back.

It was the stuff that he was saying about me to our friends that really tipped me off. All this stuff to me about how I was beautiful and strong and amazing all while he's calling me a slut and a tease (contradiction much) to our mutual friends. They came down on my side.


If you are dating a loser, hopefully these stories helped wake you up. Don't waste your time settling for less than anyone who treats you with respect and love.

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