There is a small group of private investigators in Australia who are being paid to uncover secret brothels and sex shops by engaging in sexual activity with prostitutes.
One of these investigators goes by the pseudonym of John. He's 60 years old, divorced and is what people in the sex industry call a "brothel buster."
Catalog under: news making us want to quit our day jobs.
John tells Australian News that, if search warrants cannot be obtained, he is paid by authorities to uncover unlicensed brothels by having sex with the employers who double as prostitutes and writing up detailed reports.
It's hard for police to obtain proof of illegal sex going down in these businesses like massage parlors.
Imagine how tough it must be for officers to go in there and expose sex rings: People surely aren't as likely to offer a lap dance to someone with a badge in full uniform.
That's where John steps in.
He likes to think of his gig, which requires him to do real tough sh*t for his community (like being paid to get a handjob), as one of the best retirement jobs a man could possibly find.
What's best, he doesn't even do it for the money. He tells Australian News,
I'm not driving around in a Porsche or anything. It's certainly not a huge amount. But I'm being paid to do something most people pay good money for.
You're the real MVP, John.
On that note, how does someone even get into this profession? We weren't taught how to build pathways to a career like this. Seriously, who do you have to speak to in order to get paid to have sex for a living?
(I'm asking for a friend.)