Have you ever thought you can’t be successful because you don’t have enough money, don’t live in the right city, don’t have the right connections or don’t know anyone willing to help you? I have many times, and I’m here to tell you, you need to relax.
Does anxiety ever bring about anything productive?
No, but this behavior is normal. We all struggle for ways to cope with worry because humans are programmed to rely on fear to help ease rejection. Often we don’t try hard enough to achieve our goals because our mind is trying to protect us from failing.
So, what’s the good news, you ask? The secret is that the outside world has nothing to do with making your dreams come true: Success is a decision.
You must consciously pay attention to your thoughts and realize that negativity is preventing you from flourishing. You are the only one who decides your fate; we are masters of our own universe.
Here are some of the best ways to turn your dreams into a reality:
Practice gratitude, right now.
I really can’t stress enough what this simple technique has brought to my life. I think every woman at some point thinks she is not good enough, and there’s always someone smarter, prettier, more successful and more desirable.
The only relief I have ever found for this concern is being thankful. We always think about what we don’t have, and we constantly compare ourselves to others.
Take the chance to stop for one moment and realize what you do have. You probably have much more than most people. How can you use those resources to get what you really want from life? Think about it.
Write down what you want and be specific.
Figure out what you really want before trying to make it happen. Just thinking you want to be rich, famous, live in a big city or have the perfect relationship doesn’t cut it.
You must come up with a plan and find something specific that excites you. If it’s a tall, handsome man with blue eyes, so be it. Once you write it down, it’s on its way to becoming real.
Trust your gut.
If you have to think twice about what you’re writing down, don’t write it. Don’t force yourself to do something just because other people tell you to do it; this exercise is about you. Everyone is unique and has different passions in life, so trust that all is possible.
Believe that your goals will come true.
It doesn’t matter if you live in a small town in the Midwest, or in the African wilderness; the universe has a way of bringing things to you that it believes you really want.
I grew up on St. Maarten, a small island in the Caribbean, but I always believed I would be writing and selling books in New York City.
When I was 12 years old, I used to practice my signature for people. Suddenly, as if no time had passed at all, I found myself in NYC working in fashion. Even though I still hung onto my dream of being a published author, I thought maybe I had gotten my dreams wrong.
Still, I went with the flow, trusting that the universe knew what I wanted, and this year I published my first novel. So, read what you write down; read it every day until you believe it.
Pay attention to coincidence or déjà vu.
Coincidences are not always just random events; they are hints that help turn your dreams into your reality. You must consciously recognize them and pay attention to the signs. How do they fit into your plan for success?
Forgive yourself for your mistakes and live in the present moment.
We all make mistakes, but they are in the past now. You can’t change your blunders, but you can learn from them. Everyone regrets things they have done; the trick is to live in the present moment and pay attention to what’s happening right now.
Don’t miss those little coincidences because you're stuck on feeling guilty about something you can’t change. Move forward with your dreams.
Be patient, enjoy the journey and lose the emotions.
Enjoy the good and the bad. Once you recognize that you’re always learning, you’re able to step back and analyze your experiences. One of my favorite quotes is, “This too shall pass.” This saying applies to all things, not only the bad.
When you realize that the good times will come and go as well, you stop having the highs and lows that really play with your emotions and make you lose sight of what's really important.