Things You Need In A Friendship In Your 20s Vs. Your 30s
Throughout the decades of adulting, change and growth are imperative. Your friendships will also be part of that involuntary evolution of yourself. It may sound a little bit intimidating, but we honestly get better and wiser with age, so welcome each year with open arms. With the idea of change in mind, your reciprocated needs in a friendship begin to alter as the hands on Father Time tick away. It's true that the things you need in a friendship get some grooming as you transition from your 20s to your 30s, because we really aren't the same people.
Clearly, you will still carry those same qualities that made you become best friends in the first place, but circumstances are a little different. Your best friendships should be able to weather whatever storm or obstacles your life has to face. That's what best friends are for. It's important to be receptive of the support you need from your friendship as you get older.
There's nothing wrong with an adjustment of the TLC you need from a friendship. It proves that you aren't staying in the same place in your life and you're tackling the unexpectedness of every day. There are more than a few ways needing your best friend changes over the years.
1. Keeping In Touch
In your 20s: It seems like it's easier for us to stay in contact during our first decade of adulting. We're always so hyper to make plans, and circumstances usually make it so we can do things at the drop of a dime. Texting is also a major part of this instantaneous behavior.
In your 30s: By this time, people have possibly moved, and it's important to verbally check in. You're more so getting your life in order, and a little text may get overlooked. The key here is to actually talk, touch base, and make a strong effort on both ends to get together.
2. Interacting With Your BFF's SO
In your 20s: Your most impressive quality is being a dope wingwoman. You know the ins and outs of what to do, and how to totally own the bar with your girl. Gotta stay alert for the babes.
In your 30s: Double dating may be more appealing in your 30s. And if you chose to have kids, the both of you may be organizing play dates and adorable outings. You two are basically family after all.
3. Discussing Future Plans
In your 20s: All you want to hear at this time is YOLO and do what makes you feel whole. There's a beautiful heir of invincibility that lingers around this time period in your life. It's what makes you a trailblazer and a go-getter.
In your 30s: You still want to hear some saying about how you only have one life to live, and you should be doing what makes you happy. The only difference now is that concrete steps of action are definitely what you're listening out for. There's nothing wrong with laying down the facts and bouncing ideas off your bestie.
4. Your Relentless Support For Each Other
In your 20s: We're juggling college, getting out on our own, and discovering who we are. Emotional support is needed almost day in and day out. Even if it's sitting on the couch you call a bed, talking things out is essential.
In your 30s: Of course, you're still discovering yourself, but you're a tad more established. You'll confide in your friend to discuss adjusting to a new job, home, or maybe even married life. Again, a listening ear, just different subjects, is still what you'll need.
5. Absolute Honesty About Everything
In your 20s: You'll want an honest opinion about the irrational adulting decisions you did first and asked questions about later. This could be about moving in with roommates, purchasing your first car, or hooking up with a person from your past. All of these seek the input of your bestie ASAP.
In your 30s: The honesty is still there, but it's just needed in a different way. If you get in an argument with your SO, you want to know if you were in the wrong or if you could have said something better. Sugarcoating is not something you'll ever want.
6. Remembering The Little Things
In your 20s: Seeing something that reminds you about your friend is means for a pic sent in a text. This goes back to that whole instantaneous thing. A funny Snapchat couldn't hurt, either.
In your 30s: If your BFF has taken on a new hobby or lifestyle, you may purchase or send something to promote their new ways. Also, remembering anniversaries and birthdays is a mandatory. Seriously, don't just leave it to Facebook to remind you. Friendships and the people in them go through changes and have to adjust to the situations life lays out for them. Keeping a golden friendship takes some work, but it really is priceless.