The 10 Life Lessons We've Learned From Playing Grand Theft Auto

by Julian Sonny

Ladies and gentlemen, it is officially judgement day. After nearly half a decade of tireless work and maximum effort, Rockstar Games has finally released their latest edition of the Grand Theft Auto series, GTAV. And in case you were wondering, this game has everything you need, plus some. After just one round of gameplay, it's pretty clear that this is one of those life-altering purchases that comes only a couple times with each decade and distracts all of your attention.

GTAV is going to change the world and make a ton of money as a result of it. The amount of school, work and pussy that's going to be missed out on is astronomical. But that's not to say that just like every version before it, there isn't much to learn from some of the characters, story lines and lifestyles you live within the game.

Rockstar does an excellent job of immersing gamers into an entirely new world, and with some of the new multiplayer options in GTAV, this is going to hit another level. But before we get lost in Los Santos with Trevor, Michael and Franklin, let's reflect on what guys like Carl Johnson (CJ) and Niko Bellic taught us. These are the 10 life lessons we learned from playing Grand Theft Auto.

Always expect the unexpected

From Vice City to San Andreas, all the way over to Liberty City and Los Santos, life can get a little crazy. No matter where you go, you can always expect one thing: the unexpected. You never know when someone's going to come knocking at the door, busting them guns, while you sit there on your couch watching infomercials. Keep your head on a swivel, and be smart everywhere you go. You never know who's looking for trouble in these streets.

Sometimes, life just ain't fair

This is a f*cked up world we live in, and sometimes, some f*cked up sh*t happens. Things aren't always going to go your way, and when it doesn't, keep your cool. That's just how life is sometimes. You just got to keep playing the game.

When your car catches on fire, it's time to get the f*ck out

Get out the whip!

You can only dodge the feds for so long

No matter what you do to move on from it, your past is always going to catch up with you. Live fast; die young. When the hammer comes down, don't be surprised. There is such a thing called karma, and in GTA, this is represented by the LCPD and LSPD. But at the end of the day, f*ck the police.

There is no amount of money that can't get you laid

Women come a dime a dozen in life and in GTA. From the girls at the strip club shaking it for them dollars, to the hookers infesting the streets, this is one of the very few exaggerations that the game has featured over the years. Need to bust a nut? $50 cash. What about just a quick lap dance? $20 - all ones! The best part is that you can kill the girl right after and take all of your money back (with interest!). Just kidding about that last part.

Never trust anyone

Make connections and work with others, but never trust anyone. Of course it's basic human instinct to show loyalty to people who prove themselves, which is a good thing, but always keep your eyes open. Don't be stupid. Heed those red flags that warn you someone is phony.

You can really have it all

Everything is obtainable in GTA. Even if your an immigrant from Russia, or a broke bastard from South Central, it's all out there for the taking. Play hard, and it's just a matter of time before you acquire everything you want.

It's not where you're from; it's where you're at

GTA characters have come from a variety of places over the years; but if they have one thing in common, it's that they possess the characteristics and traits of a leader. Guys who can overcome adversity and a dark past become much more and, in some cases, even a success. It's never where you're from; it's always where you're at.

At the end of the day, life's about having fun

It's just a damn game. Don't take it so seriously, man! No one's actually trying to shoot up a bunch of hookers or rob a bank (at least we'd hope not). That's why we do it in video games - just for the hell of it. If you think otherwise, then you clearly haven't even figured out how to turn on the Xbox yet.

Do whatever it takes to make it in America

No matter where you're from, what you do, what you look like, or how you sound, anyone can become a millionaire in this country. It's all about how much you lie, cheat and steal on the way (figuratively speaking) that gets you ahead in life. Nice guys finish last, and in business and crime, sometimes you lose some friends on the way. It's a lonely road to the top.

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