Lifestyle

Sláinte! 30 Telltale Signs You're The Product Of An Irish Upbringing

by Kirsten Corley
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We are well aware the Irish would have ruled the world had alcohol not been created first. But, if you are Irish, you know a few specific things to be true.

Not only do you have an entire holiday devoted to you and your heritage, which even those who aren’t Irish celebrate, but also, your ancestors are creators of the best beer, in one of the best countries in the world.

If you are Irish, you know the importance of church on Sundays, and you know all-too-well it isn’t even an option: You will get married in a church.

You also know you and your family members are some of the strongest, best people there are.

When a famine tried to knock out an entire country, your ancestors fled and survived. When the Irish were discriminated against in America, they still managed to flourish.

Most of all, you know the importance of family and continuing Irish traditions and values for generations to come.

So, here are some signs you come from an Irish family:

1. At least one person in your family is named Tommy, Timmy or Mary.

2. The only two events every family member will be at are weddings and funerals.

3. Someone in your family owns a bar.

4. Someone, or more than one person, is an alcoholic.

5. There are no secrets.

6. Potatoes are a part of every meal, and girls learning to make them is a rite of passage at Thanksgiving.

7. The greatest crisis to arise at family parties is running low on alcohol.

8. Cops have been called to more than one family event.

9. There is no "inside voice," but rather, who can scream the loudest.

10. Irish women and their tempers are nothing to tamper with.

11. The Irish goodbye is the only way to make it out of a party, unless you want to avoid an hour of goodbyes and people questioning why you are leaving in the first place.

12. You know the story of how your ancestors came to America.

13. At least one of your cousins has red hair.

14. St. Paddy's Day is strictly spelled with two D's, instead of T's, and it isn’t just a holiday but a way of life.

15. The only time Irish people talk about feelings is when they are too drunk.

16. There was always one aunt you were afraid of.

17. You respect Guinness even if you don’t like it.

18. You didn’t think getting hit by your parents was child abuse, if you deserved it.

19. Child labor laws didn’t apply your family; your mother had you working as soon as she could.

20. You don’t understand how families could be small.

21. There are cousins you forget about.

22. Meals growing up were survival of the fittest. (Not everyone could eat!)

23. Talking about food when you are eating is always acceptable.

24. There is some sort of physical competition at every family event, which results in arguing about the winner.

25. You were given rosary beads as a gift on more than one occasion.

26. You are afraid to introduce anyone you date to your extended family.

27. When you begin dating someone, the first question your family asks is what his or her last name is.

28. You know all the words to "Danny Boy," and it is played at every funeral.

29. You find any excuse to get drunk, even if that means at said funerals.

30. You know the people who aren’t Irish wish they could be.

In conclusion, it is an Irish person’s world, and everyone who isn't Irish is wishing they were.