I want to talk about a specific moment that we all experience in our lives, many of us several times within a single lifetime.
A moment that literally changes your life. A moment that you instinctively realize as a pivotal moment and nevertheless choose to ignore.
There comes a point in our lives when we have to make a decision. We have to choose between giving up, throwing in the towel and continuing to fight the good fight.
We have to choose between continuing down the difficult path that only the strongest have ever dared trodden and the path of lesser resistance. The decision can be just as much in regards to a loved activity as to a loved person – the difference is little.
We are forced to choose between continuing on the path we decided we would follow and starting over. Choosing to hit the restart button is not one that we ought to make haphazardly. But this moment alone is not the life-altering moment I want to talk about.
Specifically, I want to talk about making such a decision when we can feel that we’re making the wrong decision. We can feel that we are choosing the wrong path. We know that we should push through, but we decide against it all the same.
It’s a moment of weakness on our part, really. We forget that we’re human beings – the most evolved of all living creatures on this planet – and give in to our most basic of animalistic habits: lethargy.
We have adapted to survive thousands of years ago by being lazy. Apparently, we can’t get ourselves past this evolutionary period. We can’t stand the discomfort that difficult decisions make us feel. We don’t allow ourselves to get adjusted to the waters, but instead head back to shore to try to figure another way over the river.
It’s one thing to make a decision only then to later realize that it was the wrong decision – it happens. But to make the wrong decision knowingly is entirely different. The issue that I really have is, that in all reality, we have absolutely no good reason as to why we make such stupid decisions.
We give comfort and relaxing more importance than our dreams, our well-being, our happiness. It’s borderline insanity. How can you hope to do anything worthwhile in your life if you decide to give up when things get difficult?
When you feel it in your soul that you shouldn’t stop trying? When you know you can’t spend days or weeks without them? When you can’t imagine yourself doing anything else with your life while expecting to still be happy?
How can you stop when you know that you will think about them or it every day for the rest of your life regardless of what changes?
You rarely meet a person who hasn’t made such a difficult decision in his or her life at least once. If you haven’t yet then give it some time... you will.
Contrary to popular belief, you don’t need to make the same mistakes as everyone else. If you haven’t yet screwed things up then do yourself a favor and don’t learn it the hard way. Take it from those of us who have made such poor decisions and just take our word for it, you don’t want to throw away a good thing.
Good things don’t come by often and when they do, they rarely last. If you have something on your hands that you believe you can make work, that you will be happy doing every day for the rest of your life, then keep doing it. Keep being happy. Giving up doesn’t make sense.
If you know you should keep moving forward then find a reason to keep going. If you can’t find the passion to motivate yourself, then understand the logic.
You may be a lazy bastard, you may like to stay in your comfort zone, you may prefer not to be stressed, not to have to deal with strong emotions, and to simply float along by in life, but you will be miserable. And miserable at your own hand for that.
How much will you loathe yourself the day you wake up and realize that you screwed up? That you caused irreparable damage and have no choice but to live with your decision for the rest of your life? To live with regret is one thing. This, however, is another beast entirely.
It’s living with regret for not only making the wrong decision, but also regret for being so incredibly stupid.
The things and the people that we love are meant to remain in our lives for as long as possible. They will all disappear on their own accord one day, we're powerless to do anything about it. There’s no need for you to speed up the process.
Be smart about the decisions you make in life. Never make them while emotional and under pressure. Slow down, take your time, give it a few days. Don’t allow yourself to get caught up in the moment and blurt out something that you’ll regret, if not for the rest of your life, then certainly for years – decades even.
Look at all sides, at all possibilities, and at all possible outcomes. Hedge your bets wisely and if logic lines up with your gut, then follow your gut at all trivial costs.
Photo Courtesy: Amelia Fletcher