How To Always Get What You Want

by Paul Hudson

Why is it that as human beings we want so much? It’s material possessions, activities, living standards or people — we are continuously hungry and on the hunt for something to consume. Next question: is this a bad thing? Our world is governed by capitalism and we directly associate it with the urge of wanting.

We want something, so we go out and buy it (if it’s possible) and then we consume it until it is no longer usable. Then we move on to the next thing on our ever-growing list. Consumption is associated with production, which is associated with pollution and lack of care for our planet.

Our wants quickly take control of our lives and guide our every action. However, this does not have to be the case. There is a way of wanting and attaining what you want that will keep you satisfied for much longer — if not indefinitely — and will have a much greater positive impact than a negative one. It all starts with throwing out the concept of ‘understanding’ or ‘finding’ what you want; this will only add to your list. What we must learn to do firstly is to want the right things.

Want Less.

Counterintuitive -- I know. This is number one on the list because it’s most important — and because it came to me first, but also because it’s most important. The more you want, the more you are setting yourself up for stress and disappointment. Attaining things or reaching goals takes time and getting it all at once is not possible. For this reason, the more we want, the more we don’t have of what we want. Hence, the stress and constant focus on what you don’t have rather than all the great things that you do have in your life.

Focusing on the negative rather than the positive will ruin your mood and will act as a dark cloud hovering over your head indefinitely. Instead, figure out what it is that is most important to you. Figure out what you want more than anything else in the world and go after that and just that. Focusing on the one most important thing that you want will put the rest of your wants in perspective.

Surely you want more than just one thing — but understanding what you want most will allow you to rid yourself of your excess fat and zoom in on the second and third things that you want most. If you want more than three things than you’re just being greedy. The less you want, the happier you will be, promise.

Only Do What Matters.

We do what we do for a reason. Arguably, we do what we do because doing so brings us closer to getting whatever it is that we want. We may not like sitting in a classroom for hours every day, but we want that degree, so we suck it up. We may not want to listen to her talk, but we want to get into those panties, so we listen — or at least pretend that we do.

If you do what you do in order to get what you want, then stop doing things that don’t benefit you — that, in the larger scheme of things, don’t matter. We all need a purpose in our lives: a purpose that goes beyond superficiality and touches our core.

Why not dedicate our lives to doing things that matter? Think about it: how much time and energy do you waste doing things that you know you really shouldn’t be doing? More than you should be. Focus on doing things that are actually important to you and leave the bullsh*t for those who can’t do better.

Open An Account At The Favor Bank.

We live in a tightly intertwined society. We rely on each other an incredible amount. However, we rarely think about this because everything that we eat, drink, drive and live in has been conveniently provided for us. The truth is that no one person could ever survive alone forever — they would go mad.

No person in the world could succeed without the help of anyone else — in the very least, you will need consumers to buy whatever it is that you are selling or competition to beat. Another truth is that it’s not what you know, but whom you know that makes the biggest difference in life. Go out there and mingle. Make friends. Network. Most importantly, offer your services and a helping hand to those who need it.

Chances are that you will need (or want) something in the future that they will be able to help out with. We can all get what we want if we know the people that are able to provide it for us. Work the favor bank; do them a favor and they will know that they owe you one — even though it was unspoken.

Take Risks.

If you don’t dream big and take action, then you will never get what you desire. The more brilliant your goal, the more difficult it will be to achieve and the more at risk you will need to put yourself in in order to get it. Life is one big classroom. You try things, you fail, you try again. You fall in love, you put your heart on your sleeve, you get it broken and you pick up the pieces so that the next person can help you glue it back together.

It’s better to have tried and failed than to have never tried at all (you see what I did there?). Taking risks is an important part of developing as an individual; they will teach you more about yourself than anything else ever will. Forcing yourself out of your comfort zone and into the deep end will make your life more colorful, more exciting and more fruitful. A life without risk is a life wasted. If you don’t try your luck, then you will never get what you want.

“Don’t Stop Believin’!” And Don’t Stop Moving.

Journey was right… if you stop believing in yourself and in your dreams then you have given up before even starting. Life is a dream; sometimes I have difficulty distinguishing the two. Everything starts with a dream and is achieved through action. Not only must you dream, you must have the courage to keep moving forward — no matter how tough the going gets.

The bigger you dream, the harder it will be to get there. At times it may feel as if you are trudging through a swamp or even managed to have stepped into a patch of quicksand. At other times, it will feel like a branch fell and clonked you on the head.

You will face hardships and you will get lost. Nevertheless, if you don’t start or you stop halfway then you have failed. It’s not the failure itself that is important; everyone fails — it’s a part of learning. What’s important is that you gave up. You recognized what was most important to you. You promised yourself that you would get what you want and then you pussied out. Dream big, work hard or roll over and die; you’re wasting the oxygen.

Photos via Tumblr