Lifestyle

When You Stop Criticizing Others So Much, You'll Stop Judging Yourself

by Robin van der Vegt

People watching: a hobby in which many people indulge. All you need is a latte, a good pair of dark shades and a table with a view, and there you go.

Everyone does it and everyone loves it. But it turns us into the worst critics the world has ever seen — even worse than that of the fashion police. We criticize people about what they wear, how they walk, about their weight and about their hairstyles.

All the fun and games, you might say, are harmless. Maybe it’s true that your judgments won’t hurt these people because you’re not speaking to their faces, but is it really harmless?

Because, here is what happens next: You stand in front of the mirror and those same voices who judged the people you were watching now target you.

Just like you judged everyone out there, you are now judging yourself. I look fat in this. My hair is ugly. My nose is too big. My clothes are hideous. You tell yourself all the things you think about others, and yes, others say the same of you.

And that’s why we need to stop doing this, now. We need to stop criticizing people about their appearances, even if it seems harmless and just for fun. Because, all the things you said about others will eventually make their ways home with you and eventually, you’ll say them to yourself.

What we need to do is look in the mirror and be happy with who we are, the way we are. We need to be happy with the ways we smile and the ways we look. If you can see other people this way, you can see yourself this way. Look at other people with compassion and love.

Only then can you look at yourself with compassion and love. If you see people — really see people — you will also see your purest self. Don’t look at clothes and don’t look at body types.

See happy people, smiling people, people who are having fun. Feel compassion for people who look unhappy so you can feel compassion for yourself when you’re unhappy. Be happy with yourself all other days.

Top Photo Courtesy: We Heart It