Turning a year older is one of the most anticipated, yet nerve wracking experience that anyone encounters.
People are either excited for the upcoming life events they'll embark on once they turn a certain age or afraid of what the future might bring.
But for young adults who are departing from the adolescent age, turning a year older IS a frightening thing. Why? Because people usually expect the soon-to-be-20s to be more mature and responsible by now *freaks out.*
So, for anyone out there who is about to leave their “teenage years” and enter the world of 20-year-olds (or as we call it, “adulthood”) such as I will, here are some of the few things I've learned that helps me get through the process of “growing up” (and maybe even help me get through my future 20s life):
It's OK to be anxious about yourself.
It's only natural for people to feel as though they are “not enough” or are conscious of themselves. It's all part of maturing: becoming aware of what you need to improve on and discovering ways on what you can do to transform yourself into a better version of you.
Just because you see yourself as inadequate, doesn't mean that you are.
Think of all the fulfilling activities you do, the achievements you've accomplished and the positive attributes that you have. See these as important parts of yourself that make up your individuality and strengths.
And just because people don't see you as sufficient for them, doesn't mean that you are always lacking.
Sure, people have their own set of standards of what they like about a person, but it doesn't necessarily mean that you will never be enough for anyone.
If people do not appreciate you for who you are and are supportive of your journey toward self-development, LEAVE. Therefore…
Stop interacting/surrounding yourself with people who only see your imperfections, faults and deficiencies.
Believe me, pushing yourself to please others will only lead to your downfall.
Be open to those who are sincere and optimistic toward you.
If you're someone like me who has been through A LOT (and by a lot, I mean previous life experiences that have been damaging you mentally and emotionally up to the present), or maybe just anyone in particular who is going through rough times, do not close yourself out from the world.
If they offer you advice, a listening ear, a night out (or in) where you can eat and drink your worries away, accept their friendly gestures. Never underestimate the power of kindness. It REEEEEAAAALLLYYY does a lot to make you feel better.
Reciprocate what others give to you.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, do not be just a receiver, be a giver as well.
Show the people who are always there for you how much you appreciate them and how grateful you are for what they do.
Be there for them. Don't let them down. Do what you can to make them feel special. And of course, be genuine with your words and actions toward them.
It's OK to be confused about your life.
May it be about your plans or goals, it's all right if you are unsure about these things. At a young age (and maybe even when you're older), you never have it all figured out yet. BUT, do keep in mind that you should have a blueprint or draft of what you want and do not want for your life. Eventually, you'll find your way.
Trust yourself a bit more.
Stop your self-doubting and start thinking of what you are capable of. Just because you feel that you are way behind others, haven't reached your goals yet or are constantly failing, doesn't mean that you're worthless and weak. Be confident with yourself! YOU. WILL. GET. THERE.
Enjoy what you have now.
Don't dwell on what you're missing out right now, appreciate life the way it is. Besides, it won't be long until you get what you want. It will get better.