Have you ever been in a fight with someone and felt you should walk away before you said something you regretted?
Or -- if you didn't stop yourself -- have you ever just doubled down and continued fighting, just to make your point?
As someone who is easily infuriated by people (of course, who wouldn't be? LOL), I have realized that suppressing my anger can only do more harm than good.
Here are some of the things I've learned on how to deal with anger, fight like a mature adult and -- ultimately -- resolve disagreements without alienating people.
If the person is angry at you, listen to their side of the story.
Listen to what the other person has to say.
You may not know how negatively your words and actions are affecting the other person. Try to put yourself in their shoes and see the situation from their perspective.
If you are angry at someone, speak as calmly and sensibly as you can.
Clearly, it is difficult to stay composed when someone has provoked or hurt you, intentionally or not.
Before you confront them, take a deep breath. Maybe even take a few minutes of time out. This will help you think and act more reasonably and maturely.
Let the speaker finish their statement before explaining yours.
Some people may think it is "wise" to correct someone while they are speaking.
Remember, you're interrupting them. They may interpret what you say in various ways. They may not understand things the way you understand them.
Who knows, you may be insulting or annoying them -- even if you don't mean to. Listen before you speak.
Explain your points in a precise and detailed way.
Be as specific as possible. It'll help reduce any confusion and, hopefully, further conflict.
Do not omit relevant information. Explain your side as elaborately as you can.
If you are puzzled by the other person's side of the story, ask questions after they have spoken.
If you're confused by something they say, or if something seems vague, ask a question. The same goes if you're still bothered by something after they've given their point of view.
Clarity is the cornerstone of good communication and understanding each other, of course.
Lastly, never ever forget to remind each other of the points above.
Reminding each other to always stay calm, explain things clearly and in a detailed manner, and listen attentively can benefit the both of you.
It can improve your relationship and communication with each other. It will also help you understand each other more without having to make things worse in the process of resolving your problems.
