I used to hate the way society judges, the way it describes people, and the way it expects everyone to be.
You see, I'm not your “typical” girl, I mean yeah… I like shoes, purses, clothes, and boys, but I'm 6 feet tall. And girls can't be that tall, it's not “normal,” or at least that's not what society taught me.
All my life, I've been the tallest in the room – that includes boys and even some of my teachers – but I never really cared until now.
It started in grade school when I first noticed the difference and started thinking it was a problem. I would get called names and get gawked at by strangers. They asked if I played basketball and how the weather was "up there" just because I was tall... a tall GIRL.
Going into high school, I hoped it would go away, but it kind of kept going… and getting worse. Now the teachers gawked when they first saw me and they'd say, “Wow, you're really tall,” like I didn't already know.
I remember my math teacher wanted me to play basketball for his team, but I hated basketball; I definitely wasn't a star, and I never even played a game. A game that meant nothing to me, but to him, I was the star all because I was a little bit closer to the net than anyone else on the team.
Once I got a job, I figured it would stop too, but that was when I realized I am going to have to deal with this forever. I became a server and the customers would stare and make quick funny comments, but I always wondered why it was so weird for a girl to be this tall. Why isn't it OK? There's nothing wrong with me. I'm “normal”… right? Well, no… because society says I'm not.
AND HOW DARE SOMEONE BE DIFFERENT!
I always thought of my height as a disadvantage to how I wanted to live my life. I always thought I'd never be able to wear heels to my wedding or to walk casually down the street.
I always thought finding a boy would be so hard because no guy would want to date a girl taller than him. I always thought I would have to pre-order my pants because no company would produce a pair that didn't come up to my ankles. And I always thought being a 6-foot tall woman would be a curse and never a blessing.
You see, I used to be so careful about how I lived my life: what I said, whom I talked to, what I wore, and what I did to fill my day... all because I didn't know what people would think – what society would think.
And then everything changed.
A good friend of mine asked me why I wasn't properly dressed for work, and I was a tad confused, but I was wearing flats instead of heels. It took me a while to realize how dumb I was being because my fear of embracing my height was actually affecting my work situation.
This same friend nagged me for six weeks until I finally went and got a pair of heels – my first ever heels. They were 1.5 inches, but it was still considered a heel. Turns out… they're my favorite pair of shoes, so I bought two more pairs and my obsession grew. And yesterday I bought my first pair of 4-inch heels – and feel great in them.
Because I was pushed to think about myself instead of society, I can proudly say… I don't care anymore.
I'm not scared to wear heels or to dress up and look nice. I now acknowledge the stares, and date whomever I want because, in my mind, it's what I believe and not about the standards of society.
I used to care so much. I used to worry about what people would think of me. After all, I'm a 6-foot tall woman and not only does that make me unique, but it makes me a target: of attention, of stares, of whispers. But it doesn't matter anymore. I'm not trying to fit into what people think a woman should look like.
Society creates an image, this “perfect” image, of a girl who is 5'5”, skinny, pretty, and perfect. But I say f*ck that, f*ck society's views because no one can change who they are, and why should they want to?
Each and every single person has their own views of themselves and we -- as individuals and as a whole -- shouldn't feel the need to change those views.
So, I am going to rock these heels and be 6'3” because I like them. And that's enough for me.
I am going to wait until my perfect boy grows to see me as his perfect girl because why settle for anything less. And I'll buy regular pants too because ankles are my new favorite jeans and longs will always come and go.
My advice to you… SHINE BABY SHINE! Just because you're not society's image of perfect doesn't mean you can't be your own perfect image.
Sometimes you have to relax and stop putting so much pressure on yourself to remember that YOU ARE ENOUGH.
Originally written by Ashlyn Thomson on Unwritten.