Why Expressing Your Love In Texts Instead Of Actions Isn't Enough

by Jennifer Canace

Anyone who has lingered in the halls of a congested high school can most likely identify the couple unable to resist displays of overwhelming public affection.

As I would drudge through the crowd between fifth and sixth periods, this couple unknowingly blocked my locker every day as they mauled each other before the bell rang.

To all the couples that have obstructed an innocent student’s way to class, this one is not for you.

For those of us attempting to maintain healthy, happy relationships in today’s day and age, this generation does not make it simple. With the pressures of technology making it possible to swipe right for a date on Tinder and message someone we find attractive on Twitter, temptation is everywhere.

Although not entirely accredited to the urges of technology, our generation hasn’t eased the ability to trust someone else.

We sneak through our partner’s phone, interrogate him about the events at guys’ night out and even second-guess how late he really stayed at work. We can’t help it — our cheating generation has made loyalty nearly impossible. Thus, we need words of affirmation.

On that Thursday night, you decide to stay in and receive the “you have no reason to worry, I love you” text. Your worries begin to ease, making a solo night more bearable.

But, when we don’t hear back for hours on end, we begin to wonder how much those words really meant. What are words without accompanying actions?

In a generation inundated with emotionally distant individuals, it can be difficult to imagine why sending a text abbreviating “ILY” isn’t enough.

Thus, when we receive late-night texts filled with romantic confessions, but don’t feel loved standing face-to-face, an immediate anxiety begins to form and chip away at our cores.

This anxious feeling in our stomachs builds and builds until we can’t help but give in to our anxieties. We immediately wonder, “is it me becoming needy, or does he not feel how he says he does?”

In order for us to genuinely believe what we hear, we need proof. Grabbing our hands when moving through an intimidating crowd or gently pecking our forehead after we’ve earned an A on a paper resonates with us.

Although actions indicate proof of affection, becoming the PDA couple from our high school days is not the answer, either. Rather, proof of affection must come from a genuine desire of simply wanting to remind us that we aren’t crazy and that we really are loved.

As human beings, love is not only an inundation of emotions, but a scientifically proven innate physical drive as powerful as hunger.

In order to fulfill this desire, we need not only love, but to feel assured that it’s here to stay. When late-night confessions don’t transcend into action, we crave reassurance. Reassurance keeps us moving.

When we find ourselves in relationships that seem to have lost their luster, we fear our significant other’s feelings are now empty, meaningless confessions. As our generation continues to rely on iMessage emoji rather than real-life facial expressions, we also continue to forget what showing real emotion is like.

The remedy is simple: We crave tiny reminders of affection to reassure us. We’d greatly benefit from wearing our hearts on our sleeves, proving affection in the smallest, yet worthiest of ways. You’d be surprised how far a gentle kiss on the forehead goes.