Being called “cynical” is apparently a terrible thing in this day and age.
I have been called cynical for as long as I can remember, bringing with it a negative connotation that I really just can't wrap my head around.
Why? Because, for the life of me, I can't help but wonder, isn't being cynical a good thing?
Isn't that what protects you from self-serving assh*les who will do whatever they need to if it means getting ahead?
If you aren't thinking of things in a realistic way, aren't you just setting yourself up for disaster?
How can you be prepared if you aren’t constantly thinking about the worst-case scenario?
Thinking this way may not always be accurate or always the case, but it sure beats the alternative of having high expectations dashed by reality.
By nature, people are selfish, and the sooner you realize that, the better off you will be.
I used to take things personally when people threw me under the bus or f*cked me over, but then I realized that's just the way the world works.
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
And as sad as this may be, it's also something that makes you more resilient in life.
It makes you not take things so personally, and with that comes enormous freedom.
It doesn't matter if you consider someone to be your closest friend, watching his or her behavior in certain situations will bring to light this person’s true colors.
It's when this happens that you develop a cynical personality.
It's one thing for strangers to let you down, but it's an entirely different issue when someone close to you lets you down.
I guess this is why we shouldn't expect things out of people, but it's beyond difficult to do so when you know you would be there for the people in your life no matter what.
You weren't born cynical, but after watching the behavior of others and the way the world works, it's pretty damn difficult to think in any other way.
So please, allow me, on behalf of all cynics, to address some of the judgments that I’m sure are swirling around the heads of all the “perfect” non-cynics out there:
1. I'm not untrusting; I just have been f*cked over too many times
2. I'm not naïve; I'm just well aware.
3. I want to see the good in things; there's just so much blatantly bad sh*t out there.
4. I'm not defensive; I'm just protecting myself.
5. I'm not closed off; I'm just not an open book.
6. I'm not bitter; I just know better.
7. I'm not unromantic; I'm just not waiting for a fairytale.
8. I'm not self-centered; I just put myself first because no one else will.
9. I'm not apathetic; I just don't care about stupid sh*t.
10. I'm not negative; I'm just being honest.
11. I'm not being rude; I'm just being real.
12. I'm not being a bitch; I'm just telling you how it is.
13. I'm not cold; I've just been burned.
14. I'm not heartless; I've just been heartbroken.
15. I'd rather expect the worst than be blindsided.
16. I don't have low expectations; I just have realistic ones.
17. I'm not aggressive; I'm just straightforward
18. I don't dislike you; I just don't know you.
19. I'm not mean; I'd rather just not lie to you.
20. I'm not paranoid; I'm just being more cautious this time.
21. I'm not miserable; I'm realistic.
22. I'm not devoid of feelings; I just don't give them up right away.
23. I’m not boring; I just don’t want to play your stupid games.
24. I'm not hopeless; I've just given up on being optimistic.
25. I'm not emotionless; I'm just guarding my emotions more.
26. I'm not indifferent; I'm just a different person now.
27. I'm not blind to love; I just see things as they are.
28. I'm not lonely; I'd just rather be alone than with someone who makes me feel alone.
29. I'm not detached; I just don't want to get attached too quickly.
30. I'm not skeptical; I just know things often don't work out the way you plan.
31. I'm not too busy; I just know you will never follow through.
32. I'm not unaffected; I'm disillusioned by the illusion of it all.
33. I’m not a loner; I'll just always choose me over you.
34. I’m not impossible; I just don’t think everything is possible.
35. I'm not physically withdrawn; I just don't want to be touched by strangers.
36. I’m not trying to rain on your parade; I just don’t want to deal with any more tears.
37. I’m not an assh*le; I’m just tired of dealing with them.
38. I’m not always right; I just know when something is wrong.
39. I’m not a defeatist; I just pick my battles.
40. I’m not helpless; I just don’t rely on other people’s open hands.
41. I'm not jaded; I just know how ugly things can get.
42. I do hope things work out; they just never have before.