The Difference Between Hating Someone And Not Giving A Sh*t Anymore

by Gigi Engle

Many people confuse hatred and apathy, but they are two very distinct things. There is a big difference between saying “I hate you” and saying “I don’t f*ck with you anymore.”

Hatred is a complicated animal; it is the child of dark forces. When you hate someone, he or she has power over your life and infiltrates everything you do.

Your hate slithers into your veins like a serpent, wrapping itself around your heart. You take pleasure in witnessing this person’s demise. You want to watch him or her fail, to get hurt and to suck at life.

You spend an exorbitant amount of energy thinking about the target of your hatred, stalking his or her social media accounts and talking sh*t about him or her to anyone who will listen.

You may hate this person, but you feel very, very strongly about him or her. Even though you certainly do not want to admit it, you care. You care so much.

On the other hand, apathy is its own state of mind. That smoldering rage that comes with hatred is nonexistent.

When you say, “I don’t f*ck with you,” you’re basically saying, “I’m over you, you mean nothing to me and I don’t give a sh*t about you anymore.”

When you truly don’t care about someone, he or she has no power. He or she cannot stir your emotions or hold your attention.

When you don’t care about someone, he or she basically becomes an inanimate object. Where hatred is like gasoline, apathy is like tepid water.

Hatred is active, while apathy is passive.

You actively have to hate someone, whereas not caring about someone requires zero action on your part.

Hatred is a burning fireball of intense emotion; not caring is completely colorless and monotonous.

Hate requires passion, while not caring doesn't even muster a spark.

Hatred is fettered in the hottest of passion; you have to care about it and nurture it for it to survive.

When you hate someone, your feelings for him or her are so strong, you feel like your skin is aflame, and you just might explode with all of your hate.

While hatred inherently means your feelings are negative, hating someone takes on an almost sexual nature that stems from its ferocity.

With hatred, the demon just wants to be released, whereas with apathy, the demon doesn’t even exist.

Hatred requires a lot of energy, while not caring uses none at all.

When you hate someone, the feelings consume you. The fires need to be constantly fed in order to keep them alive. When you don’t care, you simply do not have that kind of energy to burn.

You may even genuinely want to hate this person. You may attempt to muster up irate feelings in order to give some meaning to your lost relationship. But, try as you might, you find that the only thing you end up feeling is exhaustion.

Hate has a future, while not caring means leaving things in the past.

When you don’t care, there is no interest in fixing the situation. You aren’t inclined to call, text or IM this individual. You honestly could not give less of a f*ck.

If he or she died, you probably wouldn’t notice or hear about it for months.

This person is never going to be your friend again, and instead of being broken up about it, wallowing over the loss, you simply shrug and go hang out with your other friends.

A person you don’t care about is a person left in the past with your other mistakes.

Hatred enables social media stalking, while not caring results in a block.

If you hate someone, you’re stalking him or her on all forms of social media.

You’re making fun of his or her latest vacation pictures and talking about how much you “don’t even care what he or she is doing,” all the while relentlessly scrolling through that person’s Twitter and Instagram.

When you actually don’t care, you don’t care what he or she is doing. When this person comes along in your Facebook news feed, instead of clicking on his or her profile and falling down the rabbit hole, you just casually block him or her and go along with your business.

Hatred makes you lash out irrationally, while not caring doesn't even make you lift a finger.

Where hating someone means that you scream at him or her, say the most terrible things you can think of and try to hurt him or her, not caring makes you tune a person out completely.

You don’t focus your thoughts on him or her. You aren’t throwing punches — hell you’re not even throwing shade.

Hatred consumes your mind, while not caring means you have no interest.

Apathy makes you move on from someone. You can’t even feign interest in this person or this situation. When you hate someone, it’s all that you can think about.

It poisons your thoughts and rattles your brain. It’s like a cruel form of torture you are inflicting on yourself. When you don’t care, your thoughts could not be further from that person.

You’re far too busy thinking about other things to waste a thought on him or her.

Hate is chock full of fiery emotions, while not caring has nothing underneath it.

Hate is loaded and complicated. There is always something underneath, whether or not you can admit that fact. Hatred is the mask for feelings, such as jealousy or love.

It’s far easier to hate someone than it is to channel your emotions for what he or she really is. When your hatred runs deep, it’s spun with a million different feelings.

With apathy, that’s all you get. It’s as shallow as a ranger grave. It isn’t a front for something deeper. You simply get what you see because you don’t care enough to feel more.

Hate can ruin your day, while not caring doesn’t have a place in it.

You could be having a wonderful, breezy day, but all it takes is one Facebook picture on your news feed to ruin everything. When you hate someone, he or she has a strange power over your life and infects you like a disease.

That’s what makes hatred such a damaging thing; someone you’re so adverse to can have power over your emotions.

When you don’t care, nothing about this person could affect you. Nothing he or she says, texts or posts on Instagram could attract your attention.

Hate burns up your body, while not caring doesn’t even enter your mind.

Hatred can have serious effects on your body. It’s not only mentally taxing, but also physically taxing. When you are saturated in anger, it can feel like you’re being devoured.

Your muscles ache, and your heart pinches from all of the energy it takes to be the host to something so violent. Apathy doesn’t have these effects on you because it isn’t violent; it’s just indifference.

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