Lifestyle

5 Reasons Why It's Time To End Slut-Shaming Once And For All

by Tiernan Hebron
Stocksy

Here is a list of the places where a woman is not admonished for having sex: a relationship.

That’s right, girls; unless you are in a committed relationship or married, you will be judged or shamed for choosing to have sex. Because, amazingly enough, it is 2015 and a woman is still reprimanded for what she chooses to do with her own body.

And, if you do have sex -- or heaven forbid, enjoy having sex -- you might as well paint a big red A on your chest because you are the new village outcast.

Women are supposed to be virginal and innocent and only want sex with their husbands or boyfriends because the only real reason we should want to have sex is to have a baby. Apparently, time has moved forward, but our way of thinking is still back in the 1950s.

And, ladies, it is not just men who are the culprits behind slut-shaming; we are guilty of woman-on-woman crimes.

Let’s not lie; at one point or another, we have all been guilty of having a judgmental thought or making a demeaning comment about another woman when it comes to her sex life.

The only opinion about what a woman chooses to do with her body or sex life that should matter is her own.

So, let’s choose to stop the slut-shaming in 2015 -- here are just a few more reasons why:

Sex isn’t a bad thing

This may contradict all we’ve known our whole lives, but sex is not a bad thing. It’s not something of which to be ashamed.

There are so many things sex is “supposed to be.” Sex is supposedly solely for reproduction. Sex is supposed to only take place in a marriage or committed relationship. Sex is supposed to be something you do only when you’re in love.

All of these suppositions make a woman believe she is inherently bad or doing something wrong if she does not have sex for any of these reasons.

However, there are no rules or absolutes for what sex is. Sex is whatever you want it to be. If you want to wait until marriage to have sex, that’s fine. If you want to have sex with someone you met five minutes ago, that’s fine, too.

The only thing bad or wrong about sex is when someone judges another person’s choice of how to interpret what sex means. So, cut it out.

Having a lot of sex doesn’t mean you’re insecure

Some assumptions state that any woman who has a lot of sex or many different partners is someone who is insecure or has daddy issues or some sh*t like that. If a man has a lot of sex or has many different partners, we don’t automatically assume it's because he has low self-esteem.

Rather, he does it because he wants to, or because he can, or because he has “game.” These same reasons could apply to why a woman has a lot of sex.

This may sound like an absurd concept, but maybe some women have a lot of sex or have sex with a lot of different people because they want to; maybe they do it for themselves and no one else. Crazy, I know, but women are allowed to enjoy sex with no ulterior motives.

We already have a long list of oppressors

As women, we face oppression from many different sources. Why add ourselves to that already-long list? There are a whole bunch of old white dudes trying to dictate what we are allowed to do with our bodies.

There are also already many different religions that have dismissive beliefs against women who choose to have sex before marriage or show any form of promiscuity. As fellow women, we should know the sexism and oppression we all face every day.

We can no longer be part of the problem; we can no longer put down other women for what they choose to do with their lives. We should be supporting each other, regardless of what our own personal beliefs are.

It’s none of anyone’s damn business

Would you want someone commenting on your sex life? No. It’s nobody’s business what you choose to do in the bedroom or anywhere else. So, why are we still making it our business?

Sex should be between the two or three or however many people are involved in the intercourse and no one else. And, it doesn’t matter if the people involved in the sex advertise what happened — that does not give you the right to judge.

Let’s stick to the golden rule, here: Do unto others, as you would have others do unto you. If you don’t want someone calling you a hoe-bag for what you chose to do, then don’t call another person a hoe-bag for what he or she chooses to do.

It’s 2015

It’s 20-freaking-15. Wouldn’t you say it’s about time for all this oppression against women to stop? I mean, how is it possible we have not evolved in our way of thinking?

As women, we have made great strides in the past few decades with regard to gender equality and feminism, but there are still plenty of issues plaguing our society today, and slut-shaming is one of them.

Let’s continue making strides and abolish slut-shaming in 2015 and forever after.