Why You Need To Burn Some Bridges In Your 20s
Our parents always told us "don't burn your bridges." It was a sensible ideal that we all tried to live by. But with the popularity of Marina Shifrin's viral "I quit" video leading to a job on Queen Latifah's talk show, many of us are left to ponder the advantage of burning bridges.
As we get older, and wiser, there are going to be situations in which burning bridges is not only okay, but necessary. Because, as we head into our adult lives, there is less room for everything in our past.
In life there's some stuff that needs to be cut off and some ends that need to be tied up for good. If you believe in fate, you understand that everything happens for a reason and sometimes you just need to move forward and never look back. Too many people cling to the past instead of marching towards the future.
"Sometimes burning bridges isn't a bad thing. It prevents you from going back to a place you should never have been to begin with..." -Unknown
If you want to take full advantage of your life and every opportunity that comes your way, you will need to burn some bridges along the way. Anything worth achieving means making sacrifices. If that means permanently closing some doors, so be it.
In Your Love Life.
If you are in a relationship that doesn't help you grow, you need to get out of it. Relationships become a big part of your life and you must be sure that you are with someone that won't keep you from pursuing your dreams. Your partner should be someone with their own aspirations and goals, not latching onto yours. Being single isn't the worst thing in the world and will most likely be a good break for you to figure your life out.
"Being alone is better than sitting next to a lover and feeling lonely. -Richard Linklater
You also shouldn't have a relationship with your ex. That relationship is over, and if you are holding onto it because you think that maybe you were supposed to marry them, stop. Because you would have known if you were supposed to be with them. One of the more important aspects of growing up and maturing is leaving behind relationships that weren't good for you.
You don't want to walk into your next relationship still carrying baggage from the last one. It will doom the relationship from the start, never giving you a fair chance to make this one work. It may be hard to be alone as you enter the single world again, but only once you have lost everything are you free to do anything.
In Your Friendships
Losing a friend is always hard, but sometimes it's for the best. Like our lovers, we can also grow out of them. Sometimes the things you had in common with your best friend become distant parts of your past that you are only holding on to to sustain the friendship.
I drank a bottle of wine for company -Ernest Hemingway
In order to move up in life, you are going to have to pick and choose who is worth maintaining a friendship with. Because as your work becomes a larger part of your life it will become particularly hard to find time to spend with friends. Thus, you can only have so many due to sheer availability.
Sometimes your friendships represent a part of your past that you no longer share. It's a friendship with the person you were and not the person you are now. You need to give yourself room to grow even if that means letting go of some people.
Allow yourself to become the person you are destined to be and meet new friends. Keeping old friends is great but making new friends is necessary.
In Your Job
You are too young to be settling for a job you hate. You have the rest of your life ahead of you and being stuck in a dead end job is not a good way to start it. There are millions of opportunities out there and giving up before you even find them is a fate worse than death.
Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy. -Robert Tew
This is especially true if you are trying out a new career. You must have the courage to quit your job if it's not stimulating you. Don't fret because you can no longer put it on your resume, it probably won't help your case anyway. Your new job is going to hire you based on your ability to succeed, and if that means you left a job behind to achieve that goal, they will only respect you for it.
Sometimes you just need to close a door to open a new window of opportunity. If you hold onto the past, thinking there is hope of always getting your old job back, you will never have the courage to passionately pursue a new direction. Because only once we've lost everything are truly free to do anything.