Best Disney Quotes That Sum Up Your Sex Life In Your 20s
Your sex life can be pleasing, complicated, and super random in your 20s. At a young age, we were shown by Disney movies how a love life should unfold. Once we were old enough to stop cutting our toes on glass slippers and kissing frogs, we took our love lives into our own hands. Then, quite frankly, we experienced some of the funniest, unbelievable, and cringeworthy stories you stumble upon on the internet. So, because we are so bound to these oh-so-helpful Disney movies, it's only logical that sex in our 20s can be described by some of the best Disney quotes.
Before you cast the first stone at me for even considering the similarities of Disney and anything sexual, get more stones ready, because I wasn't the first. Disney has been decoded many times for its not-so-PG tendencies. I guess this majorly explains why a lot of those hopeful sayings apply to our sex lives in our 20s. More than just a few times Disney assembled the words we couldn't for our rated R behavior. So, buckle up, and chuckle about how on point these Disney quotes are about describing our sex lives.
1. The First Time Someone Made You Orgasm
It's no joke, the tantalizing cloud of fluster you enter when someone besides yourself makes you orgasm. Because Jasmine from Aladdin knows all about being swooped off her feet, we majorly know the feeling when she says, "A whole new world, a dazzling place I never knew." Seriously though, are we still on earth?
2. When You Successfully Put A Condom On The First Try
Timon from The Lion King truly encompasses all of our feels when he said, "It means no worries for the rest of your days." There is no Hakuna Matata in unprotected sex with someone you hardly know. A peace of mind is staying protected.
3. When You Try Hard To Orgasm And Don't
Sadly, Elsa beat us to the punch of describing our frustrations when she said, "Let it go, let it go. Turn away and slam the door." Childish, maybe, but no one likes to leave empty handed when they've put so much work into something. That is not how happy endings work.
4. When You Finally Break Your Dry Spell
Since they both involve some tortuous spell, it's only logical that The Princess and the Frog's "You're the best thing I never knew I needed," describes the end of a dry spell. Look, it's liberating as hell to finally get some TLC you've been wanting. Literally, almost as relieving as becoming human again, right?
5. When You Unexpectedly Queef Loud AF
Look, it happens and it's sort of uncontrollable. Luckily, we have Pocahontas to remind us that "You can paint with all the colors of the wind." That's right, us ladies don't discriminate on where the winds come from.
6. When You're Determined To Nail A New Position
We know entirely too well what Philoctetes in Hercules meant when he said, "Giving up is for rookies," during our exploration of knew positions. Curiosity doesn't kill the cat in this case, but never trying does. I'm not sweating, you are.
7. When You're Entirely Not In The Mood For Sex
Mike Wazowski from Monsters Inc. literally took the words right from our mouths. He said, "Put that thing back where it came from or so help me." When you're not in the mood, you're just not in the mood.
8. When You're Super Hesitant To Try New Foreplay
Leave it to Merlin from The Sword in the Stone to give us the courage to try new foreplay when he said, "It's up to you how far you'll go. If you don't try, you'll never know." Oh Disney, where would we be without your words of wisdom? In a cyclically, boring life of no new foreplay.
9. Reiterating Your Status After Sex With Your Friend With Benefits
We are all here for Andy and Woody's friendship on Toy Story. This is why we will also say, "Boy, you've got a friend in me," after some fun with our own variation of a friend. No matter how amazing it was, you have to check the platonic box each time. Thanks, Toy Story.
10. When You're Trying To Pitch The Idea Of Getting Oral Sex
The song "Under the Sea" from The Little Mermaid, supplied every woman with her oral sex pitch when they said, "Darling it's better, down where it's wetter." Hey, it's not our fault that that one physical encounter tends to get overlooked. Ariel was always our favorite, anyways. Regardless of how you interpret Disney, its wisdom seriously applies to our sex lives in our 20s. Sorry, not sorry, if you're unable to watch Disney movies the same after reading this.