30 Questions You Have About Yourself You Should Be Able To Answer By 30

by Lauren Martin

Your 20s are a time for questions; your 30s are a time for answers.

At least, that’s what everyone makes you believe. In your 20s, it’s fine to make mistakes, have learning experiences and explore all the possibilities that once seemed so far from you. Your 30s, however, are another experience, another chase.

Obviously, you’re still young in your 30s. By no means do you stop learning, growing or questioning, but by 30, you should know a few things about yourself you maybe didn’t even think to ask in your 20s.

These questions aren’t ones about what you should be doing or how you should be investing your money. They're questions about who you are as a person and what kind of person you want to become.

They're the kind of questions you need to answer for yourself if you're ever going to be able to answer anyone else’s. They're the personal ones -- questions discovered after years of self-analysis.

You’re not old at 30, but you are older. And being older means being wiser, and being wiser means having a few answers.

1. What am I looking for in a partner?

A relationship in your 30s is no longer about figuring out what you want, but chasing after it.

2. Is this the person I want to spend the rest of my life with?

If you're waiting for the person you're with to change, move on. People never change, but the way we look at them does.

3. What will make me happy?

You know what you want and what you don’t want. If you’re still unhappy in your 30s, it’s a question of your conviction.

 4. Is this worth it?

If what you're doing is worth the sacrifice, you’re doing the right thing. If not, get out.

5. Is this the job I want in 10 years?

Your 20s are all about those experimental jobs. By your 30s, you should be on your way to the job you've always dreamed of.

6. Do I miss him? Do I miss her?

If you’re still thinking about the one that got away now, there’s a reason. You're no longer using these years for wondering, but trying your best to get that someone back.

7. Do I have any real regrets?

Your 30s are about fixing mistakes or leaving the old ones behind — not making new ones.

8. What goals do I still have?

It’s not about looking at the goals you never got to, but the ones you still have to get to.

9. What impact do I want to make?

You know you don’t have to make it by 30, but you should be on your way.

 10. Do I want a family?

There is no right or wrong answer to this and, by 30, you've stopped worrying about it.

11. Are my friends really my friends?

You learned in your 20s you don’t need a lot of friends -- just the right ones.

12. Am I a good friend?

The way people treated you in your relationships in your 20s is indicative of the kind of friend you still are in your 30s.

13. Is this the city I want to live in?

You spent your 20s moving all over the place; now you know where you're ready to stop.

14. When was the happiest time of my life?

If you still don’t know, it’s still ahead of you. If you do, fashion your life in that manner.

15. Am I a good daughter? Am I a good son?

You know when you're no longer relying on your parents, but giving them the confidence to rely on you.

16. Am I a good person?

This is something you should know no matter how old you are. Just look at yourself.

17. Do I care what other people think?

You know you may never stop caring, but by 30 you've stopped letting it affect you.

18. Should I feel guilty about cutting someone off?

You learned from all those broken relationships in your 20s that not all friendships are worth your time and energy.

19. Are my friends the friends I want for life?

Your 20s aren't about making lifelong bonds, and your 30s are about understanding that.

20. Do people respect me?

You built your respect level in your 20s and plan on using your 30s to capitalize on it.

21. Do I care enough about my body?

By the time you turn 30, these questions become less about finding a solution and more about finding acceptance.

22. Can I speak up for myself?

Your 20s were for finding your voice, your 30s are about using it.

23. Is it too late to change?

Your 20s were about asking this question; your 30s are about proving it wrong.

24. Do I need someone?

Your 30s are all about knowing the difference between what you need and what you want. This difference will save you all those terrible relationships.

25. Do I need more?

Your 20s were about gluttony. By your 30s, though, you know when enough is enough, and how much will actually kill you.

26. Am I ready to be an adult?

Your level of adulthood does not depend on your age. Only at 30 do you learn this.

27. Have I challenged myself?

Your 20s were about learning how awful living in a routine is; your 30s are about having the guts to switch it up.

28. Will I find love?

Your 30s aren’t about finding love. They're about being comfortable enough with yourself to stop worrying about it.

29. Do I have the life I wanted?

Your 20s were about making dreams. Your 30s are all about the execution.

30. Am I really 30?

Yes, but age doesn't scare you anymore. You're older, wiser and bolder after those wild and lost 20s.