17 Unbelievably Selfish, Yet Relatable, First World Problems

by Katie Berbert

“First-world problems” is a term coined to describe the everyday struggles of people lucky enough to live comfortably in first-world countries. It’s sad, but true.

On a daily basis, many people suffer from first-world problems, as opposed to real-world problems, like hunger and poverty.

I, myself, have experienced some — if not all — of the first-world problems included in this list, but when you think about them, it’s almost absurd how big we allow these problems to feel:

1. The remote is too far away.

I’m wrapped up in my Snuggie, perfectly comfortable on my couch, and my cable-aired movie is over. 

All I want to do is change the channel, but the remote is on the table… on the other side of the room!

Hundreds of entertainment options are available could be at my fingertips and the possibilities could be endless... if only the remote wasn’t two steps away.

2. The pizza is late.

I called the pizza place an hour ago — why isn’t there a pizza arriving at my doorstep this very second?

I’m hungry. I’m actually probably starving at this point... so why isn’t it here?!

3. The WiFi code is too long.

Wait, I need a long code to access the worldwide web?

Why can’t it be a simple password, like “INTERNET123?” Typing this in will take me an extra 15 seconds!

4. My phone broke so I’m using my backup.

OMG my iPhone 6 broke so I have to go back to using my iPhone 5, which is so outdated now and doesn’t have nearly as good of a selfie camera.

I guess I’ll have to survive in the STONE AGE for a little bit.

5. I have too much luggage.

I’m really struggling to carry all of my luggage to the check-in desk. Why is everything so heavy?

I just have too many personal possessions. Ugh, I have to pay to check an additional bag?

Why can’t I just bring my entire wardrobe with me wherever I go, free of charge?

6. I just used my last Pandora skip.

I can’t believe I used my skip on a song that I only dislike a little and now, I have to listen to this song I absolutely hate! Why do I suffer so?

7. There are too many items on this menu.

Plain and simple, this restaurant has too much food and I am an indecisive human. What am I to do? How do they expect me to function like this?

8. I forgot to record my favorite show, so I’ll have to watch it on Hulu later.

I can’t believe I forgot and now, I have to wait 24 more hours before I find out who “A” is! Oh what a cruel world we live in.

9. My butter is so cold that it ripped my bread.

Can’t we get some semi-warm, spreadable butter around here? Maybe some margarine? I can’t deal with ripped bread! How am I supposed to eat something so disfigured?

10. I ate too much and now, I’m going into a food coma.

I am so tired because I just ate so much. Oh. My. God. All those calories I just consumed.

11. My charger isn’t long enough.

My phone is about to die, but I want to play Trivia Crack while I lay in bed. Too bad my life absolutely sucks and my charger isn’t long enough to reach.

12. The barista spelled my name wrong.

How dare she? Doesn’t she know who I am? I order my grande, iced, sugar-free, vanilla latte with soymilk every Tuesday morning!

13. The people I hired to mow my lawn came too early and woke me up.

Really? They had to come at 8 am do my yard work for me while I lay in bed? They couldn’t come at 10? Really?

14. I forgot my credit card, so I have to pay with cash.

It gets confusing trying to remember all my forms of payment. I guess I’ll just have to settle for paying with plain old cash today.

15. This free food sucks.

Work got us free coffee and bagels this morning, but they didn’t get my favorite flavor of cream cheese and the coffee is only lukewarm. My life sucks.

16. It’s not loading on my iPad, so I guess I’ll have to use my phone or my laptop.

Damn technology, why won’t this YouTube video of singing cats load on all my devices?

17. I have more salsa than I do chips.

My ratio of chips to salsa is so bad that it’s throwing my entire snack schedule off.

Now I must face the age-old dilemma: Do I go buy more chips, and if I do, will I have to buy more salsa, too?

Next time you or someone you know faces a first-world problem like one of the ones listed above, please remember the real-world problems that so many deal with every day. Consider yourself lucky.

Now, move two feet to get that remote.