Well, the best time of year has arrived.
Pumpkin spice everything is on the shelves and in the air, dollar stores are selling Christmas trees well before Halloween and women are assaulting my eyes by insisting on inappropriately wearing leggings.
I know what you're thinking. How many articles can we write and read on this topic?
Yet, we're still here, with women all over the world showing their nether regions, and all of God’s gifts, to those of us who would rather not know them so intimately.
I thought I would come up with a resource for busy women who don’t want to bother reading multiple long lists and blogs while trying to decide if leggings as pants is the way to go.
If you're looking in the mirror and wondering if your look is on point, you must first answer these four questions:
1. Can you see through the leggings?
If the answer to this question is anything other than no, you can’t wear those leggings as pants. If you can kind of see through them, the answer is no.
If you can completely see through them, you aren’t wearing leggings; you're wearing tights, and the answer is hell no.
Go put on real pants, please.
2. Have you seen anyone wear an outfit similar to the one you have on?
If you haven’t, it’s best to snap a pic and send it to your most honest female friend for some real feedback.
Listen to whatever advice she gives you, even if she says you are, in fact, wearing tights and must go put on real pants.
If you've seen someone wearing an outfit like yours before, ask yourself where you saw this person.
If the last time you saw someone wearing an outfit like this was in Walmart, think back to the event.
Are you positive there wasn’t anyone hiding in the corner, taking pictures of that person?
If you’re sure no one was taking pictures of the outfit to upload to "People of Walmart," proceed to question three.
If you’re not 100 percent positive, you might want to snap a pic and send it to that honest friend of yours anyway.
3. Does your top cover both your hoo-ha and your butt?
In order to wear any leggings as pants, the answer to this question must be yes.
You cannot be flashing in the front or the back for the sake of an outfit. Period.
4. What kind of shoes are you wearing?
Basically, the only acceptable shoes when wearing leggings as pants are flats and boots.
Unless the outfit in question is part of a costume, you cannot wear heels when sporting leggings as pants.
You also cannot wear Uggs.
The only exception to wearing Uggs with your leggings is if you're a college-aged sorority girl.
After all, college-aged women really do fall into their own category of fashion.
You can also get an exception to this rule if you're a mother of a toddler.
If you’re a new mom, changing out of the clothes you slept in is an accomplishment on some days. No one will try to tell you what to wear.
If you don’t fall into these categories, and continue to wear Uggs or heels with your outfit, please go put on real pants.
If you are at a crossroads, refer to this simple infographic. Remember: When in doubt, put on real pants.