Guy Asked To Keep GF's Tortoise Safe Parties Hard With It Instead (Photos)
A couple of weeks ago, I woke up to discover the avenue outside of my apartment was closed down for 15 blocks in either direction for a street fair I had no idea existed, and after confirming the presence of corn dogs, I headed outside to investigate further.
Four hours later, I returned with my first sunburn of the summer, multiple ATM receipts and all of the equipment needed to take care of the small lizard I apparently thought was a responsible purchase after three Styrofoam cups of margaritas I'd purchased from someone I later realized wasn't a licensed vendor.
Why does any of this matter? Because in the short time I've known Dalton (named after Patrick Swayze's character in "Road House"), I've discovered reptiles party harder than I ever would have guessed.