Lifestyle

People Are Letting Pepperoni Pizza Answer All Of Life's Hard Questions

by Gillian Fuller

Unfortunately, most of us aren't gifted with the ability to see into the future.

And paying a therapist to kind of, sort of, not really help us answer our really important life questions is a (costly) luxury not all of us can afford.

Thankfully, Maddy Varner, a genius over at Free Art & Technology, has the solution, and this magical problem-solving technique will prove to be your savior in more ways than you could ever imagine.

Why? Because it involves pizza.

The methodology of the pizza séance is simple.

First, you order a pizza via your favorite delivery site. In the special instructions box, indicate you'd like the pepperoni (or topping of your choice) arranged in either a “Y,” “M” or “N” shape (standing for yes, maybe or no).

When your pizza arrives, Varner instructs, “tip your pizza oracle kindly, and thank him for his hard work.”

Next, place the pizza box down, sit in front of it and prepare for the séance.

Ask your very important life question loudly, directing it at the pizza, and slowly raise the lid as you inhale the scent of cheese, dough and good vibes.

Open the box fully, and via the arrangement of your toppings, “find enlightenment.”

This is undoubtedly the most fool-proof method to ensure you'll live a long, happy life full of good decisions and cheese. Through pizza, you will learn the secrets of the world.

The holy pizza is never wrong.

Pizza.

Citations: Pizza Seance (Free Art & Technology), Let Pizza Make All Your Major Life Decisions For You (The Cut)