This Motorboating Party Goat Has A Much Better Life Than You (Photos)

There's something about tiny, furry animals that make people do things they normally wouldn't, which is why it's apparently acceptable to make out with your dog even though doing the same thing with your goldfish is considered "morally objectionable."

Speaking of "morally objectionable," I've recently realized an alarming number of supposedly sane people have been creating and maintaining Instagram accounts dedicated solely to tracking the misadventures of their furry friends.

I'd like to decry the trend as excessive and useless, but I can't do that now that I've discovered Doug the Party Goat.

As you may have guessed by his name, Doug is a goat and knows how to party better than you ever will.

He wears those to avoid being blinded by his own brilliance.

Doug, you motorboatin' son of a bitch!

Absolutely shameless.

"I just need to rest my head for a second." Sure you do, Doug. Sure you do.

Redefining G.O.A.T. one picture at a time.

Vaya con dios, brah.

I think she might be a fan.

"Nice to see you again, Mr. Party Goat. Would you like your usual suite?"

He doesn't smoke cigarettes -- he eats them because goats eat literally everything.

Something tells me Doug doesn't really care about the five-second rule (or rules in general).

Rolling deep with the whole squad.

Being a literal party animal can be hard. Sometimes you need a break.

It kind of looks like aliens are trying to abduct Doug in this picture, and I have to say, I'd probably do the same thing if I had the chance.

I'm assuming Doug took this picture on his own. Good luck convincing me otherwise.