10 Things You Can Tell Your Parents If They Catch You Smoking Weed

by Julian Sonny

We've all been there. You're trying to kick it with the homies and put something in the air when, all of a sudden, your parents come home early. F****ck.

There are different degrees of trouble you can get in depending on what the severity of the situation is. Did you just box out your entire crib and never open a window? Well, it's a wrap.

But what if your bud is so loud that just breaking it up reeks up the whole room? We've all been there before. Then again, you can get caught mid bong rip trying to play it off when your parents think you're smoking a large crack pipe. That can be tricky.

But if you're a real stoner, you know how to swag this scenario out. There are a select amount of words (not many) that can get you out of any situation, no matter how hotboy it may be.

So lick your lips, take a sip of water and get ready to lie your ass off. These are the 10 things you can tell your parents if they catch you smoking weed.

"What smell?"

Maybe they're just as stupid as you are... or they're just testing you. Don't fall for their trap!

"What are you talking about? It's oregano."

You better have that pizza on deck. It'll look a lot more inconspicuous.

"There's a war going on and you're worried about weed?!"

Real talk, though.

"I'm trying to prevent blindness."

Not being able to see sh*t is never cool. Unless you're Stevie Wonder. Then you're the man.

"You guys didn't love me enough!"

Getting on your emo sh*t is always a smart tactic. Make them feel like THEY messed up.

"I'm doing a science project."

Study high, get high grades?

"What's weed?"


"At least it's not cocaine!"

Weed is only a gateway to one thing -- Cheetos.

"[Insert Your Name] isn't here right now. Please leave a voicemail."

If you're high enough, it MIGHT work.

"Wanna hit?"

You never know. Just remember, your parents LIVED in the 80s (the decade of crack).