If you really hate yourself may I recommend you take a bite of Paqui's Carolina Reaper chip.
I say "chip" in the singular because Paqui's mouth-scorcher is not meant to be eaten in handfuls. It's meant to be digested one at a time and probably followed up with a full gallon of milk.
That bad boy is coated in dust made from Carolina Reaper peppers, the same peppers that broke records by clocking in at 2.2 million Scoville units.
Jeff Day, Brand Manager for Paqui Chips, told Mashable,
This chip is so hot that it isn't even sold in bags. It is distributed to consumers in tiny little coffins that would be adorable if its contents weren't notorious for melting your face off.
Day points out,
He later went on to say,
If, for some reason, this seems like something you'd want to get involved with Paqui is currently holding the "PAQUI CAROLINA REAPER ONE CHIP CHALLENGE."
To enter, all you have to do is film yourself eating one of these mouth grenades and tag the video with @PaquiTortillas, #OneChipChallenge and #sweeps. (that, or you can enter through their site).
Everyone that enters gets a free bag of Paqui chips with a select few grand prize winners taking home a GoPro and a years supply of chips so that you can continue harming yourself for an entire 365 days.