Entertainment

Ellen DeGeneres And Portia De Rossi Adopted A 'Kid'

by Eitan Levine
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AHHHHH!!! THIS IS THE BEST NEWS!!!

Portia de Rossi and Ellen DeGeneres are everyone's favorite Hollywood couple. Who doesn't love them? Seriously, show me people who don't love this perfect couple, and I will fight them. NOBODY DOESN'T LOVE PO-LEN WHEN I'M AROUND!

Sorry for yelling. People who don't think Portia and Ellen are gifts to humanity make me FURIOUS.

Anyway, I have news from the kingdom of Po-Len! A KID ARRIVED AT THE CASTLE, A POSSIBLE HEIR TO THE DANCING THROWN OF DEGENERES!

The announcement was made on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show," and I'm convinced the world will never be the same.

The secret's out. Portia & I have a kid. I posted this video of him on ellentube. Brace yourselves. He's adorable. Posted by Ellen DeGeneres on Thursday, January 14, 2016

Ahhhhh, gotcha!!! Ellen, you tease! There's no baby, just a puppy -- like a diet baby, if you will.

That was cute. Now, Ellen and Portia, please go adopt an actual baby so humanity can obsess over him or her.

Citations: Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi Finally Have a 'Kid'! (Entertainment Tonight)