Entertainment

Elijah Finally Gets His Life Together And Chases His Dreams In The New 'Girls'

by Taylor Ortega
HBO

Our boy Elijah has spent all season spitting "Girls'" best one-liners and acting as a color commentator for Hannah and the gang, but what about his own ambitions?

Truth is, throughout his entire arc on the series, most of Elijah's passions have been of the party or romance variety.

We know he moved to New York to be an actor, but he somehow ended up with a job at Bendel's and an obsession with the theatrical accomplishments of his college nemesis, Ryan Dylan Duncan.

In episode seven of the final season, Elijah faces his fear of failure and drags his ass to an open call for the Broadway musical adaptation of "White Men Can't Jump."

Before Elijah is able to make it out of his apartment in his "little basketball outfit" and off to his audition, though, famous ex Dill Harcourt storms back into his life.

Dill is desperate for shelter from swarming paparazzi following an attempt to purchase a white baby on the black market.

Rattled, Elijah leaves Dill with Hannah, who is languishing at home, waiting for Paul Louis to return her call so she can drop the baby bomb on the unwitting father-to-be.

Dill quickly assesses Hannah's pregnancy -- either because he's a beautiful genius or he's spent so much time doing consumer research in the white baby trade -- and urges her to tell Paul Louis and give the baby a chance to grow up with a father.

He tells Hannah his own father's absence left him "totally incapable of accepting divine male love."

At his audition, Elijah arrives only to be immediately called into the room. He panics and bolts for the exit, but on his way out encounters fellow hopeful Athena Dante warming up in the stairwell.

Through youthful optimism and infectious confidence, she convinces Elijah to turn around and follow through with his mission.

Finally, longtime "Girls" fans are treated to seeing accomplished Broadway actor Andrew Rannells lend Elijah his talent in an amateur audition process in which he (obviously) nails the singing portion.

The casting directors, barely paying him mind as he belts "Let Me Be Your Star," from "the hit show 'Bombshell' from the hit TV show 'Smash,'" tell him to stay for the monologue portion of the audition.

A small segment of the episode is dedicated to Marnie -- whose life has been steadily unraveling pretty much since the moment viewers met her -- realizing how her own shiftiness contributed itself to her divorce, eviction and stalled career.

To make rent, she attempts to pawn presumably valuable family heirlooms only to discover the diamond earrings her father gave her are glass and the gold necklace her mother handed down to her on her Sweet Sixteen is pewter.

In that moment, Marnie goes OFF on a wise pawn shop owner who then calmly convinces her to look inward. He warns her, "The liar is you."

A quick FYI for non-New Yorkers who didn't find themselves rolling their eyes throughout this encounter: Nowhere in Manhattan or its surrounding boroughs does there exist a pawn shop owner willing to spend time guiding you to an introspective epiphany.

This city is just not actually as magical as Marnie's unlikely mentor or "Home Alone 2: Lost in New York" would have you believe. In fact, it's mostly just finance bros now -- the least magical of all creatures.

Elijah slays the song and monologue portions of his audition and waits with Athena to see if they've made it through to the dance call.

In a genius act of pettiness, the casting directors rattle off a list of names with neither Elijah's nor Athena's on it, yet reveal those names "can go home, thank you so much," while the rest of the hopefuls "can head into the studio for the dance portion."

Elijah tells Athena he "loves this bitchy business so much" and, somehow, the mind games of the entertainment industry suit him just as much as the actual performance aspect. Elijah is clearly in his element, reaffirming his original ambitions and his belief he's "really, really fucking talented."

Hannah gets a call back from Paul Louis, whose good-natured yet dismissive reaction to the news of her pregnancy is jarring despite being precisely the way a windsurfing instructor who "doesn't believe in mistakes" would likely react to such a revelation.

Stunned and saddened by how easy it was to convince Paul Louis she'd be fine raising their child alone, Hannah willingly weeps with Dill.

His issues are nowhere near as terrifying as Hannah's -- she is officially a single mother managing her own evolution into adulthood, whereas he's a rich, weepy manchild -- but he's present in a moment when Hannah is terrified of the lonely road ahead of her.

Elijah is shot down from his high when the choreographer suggests someone "bring the basketballs in." He bombs with a basketball, even injuring a fellow audition-er when he chucks it at his nose at close range. His dreams, it seems, died again just as quickly as they were resurrected.

For viewers, though, there's some sick joy in watching Elijah both succeed and fail. This episode takes the silly, fun Elijah moments that generally exist in small measure and stretches them out to be the focus of the week.

Only he and Shoshanna deliver the sort of exaggerated, in-your-face quirkiness that gives "Girls" its moments of straightforward comedy in an otherwise wry, sardonic show.

Elijah returns home pretty convinced he won't get cast as a White Man who Can't Jump, but seems renewed by his attempt. He tells off Dill (but eventually welcomes him back into his bed, because -- hello -- they totally still love each other) and wakes up to a call from the casting directors.

They don't care how awful Elijah is with a basketball, or that he "can't dance for shit." They want him to read for producers. They believe he has an "element." It's showbiz nonsense at its best, but Elijah's belief in himself has returned, validated and reinforced.

~*WoRd gEmS*~

Hannah: Do not let another homeless woman in here, please. Elijah: She was fun and you know it.

Dill: Do you have anything to eat that doesn't have an activity center on the back?

Athena: Men are only on this Earth to buy us jeans.

Dill: Listen, Hannah, you need to think about the effect this could have on your child -- what they might miss. They could find themselves alone, aging, embroiled in a public scandal in Queens in an ex-lover's squat house. Hannah: OK we're in Brooklyn right now and this is an apartment. Dill: It just sounds so much sadder when you try to defend it.

Athena: Good dick is a prison.