It's not too soon to give Blac Chyna's mom her own reality show, is it?
Tokyo Toni, aka Shalana Hunter, joined her daughter, Blac Chyna, and her future son-in-law, Rob Kardashian, for a family dinner with her ex, Chyna's father, and three of his other children on a recent episode of "Rob & Chyna."
Over the course of less than two minutes of footage, it becomes super apparent how much Toni deserves a spin-off.
1. She looks like she could be Blac Chyna's twin.
Was the doctor who birthed Chyna also a witch who allowed Toni to trade her placenta for eternal youth? Because she is ageless and that's some powerful currency in Hollywood.
2. There is power in her silence.
Her eyes say so much, but chiefly that she's not here to fuck around.
I just want her to like me. Why do I want her to like me so badly? I don't know this woman, yet all of a sudden her approval is all I need to live.
Air is poison to my lungs as is water to my skin without her acceptance.
Like me, Toni. Like me like America will like you.
3. Her daughter describes her as "known for not giving two fucks."
*Rubs hands together like an evil cartoon scientist*
4. Sound effects.
Toni's not afraid to generate sound effects.
In this case, she mimics the sound of a car screeching to a halt when Chyna mentions she and her two half-siblings are merely a few months apart in age.
Sound effects are a showbiz classic. They enhance the viewing experience in a way a plain ol' “Excuse me?” never could.
5. This awkward-ass kiss with Rob Kardashian.
I WILL WATCH SEVEN HUNDRED MORE OF THESE, PLEASE.
Spin her off, E!. Spin her off today.