Dating in the 21st century is challenging, even painstaking work. The majority of the time, it would be easier to dive headfirst into the Atlantic Ocean and find a tails-up penny within a cluster of anemones than it would be to find someone worthwhile with whom you see a real future. Exaggeration? Maybe (n0).
For some of us Millennials — myself included — it's a lot easier to secure a full-time job than to discover a valuable partner. If this rings true for you, it is perfectly okay, considering that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn't love you anymore.
As my business prowess increased over the years, I began to feel like dating was rather similar to the interview process. I had consultations with men who could potentially be hired for one of the most coveted jobs on the planet (my significant other, duh).
Dinner dates are equivalent to the "foot in the door," where you're already halfway there and suited up to make the best first impression possible. Wearing the right LBD is comparable to a firm handshake and ordering the appropriate, economically-priced entrée is like staking claim for your future salary.
There are a few, simple ways in which you can play HR recruiter and determine whether the prospective candidate is the right guy for the job:
Social Media Background Checks
Accepting a Facebook friend request and hitting that "follow" button on Instagram opens the door to a world of surreptitious detective work, especially if the privacy settings have not been put to use.
You get a small glimpse into a person's world, from which you can semi-gauge his attitude and behavior. His photos may tell a story of someone who is cute, fun and determined, or may convey that it is all a façade and he is not worth your time or effort.
This is also a great opportunity to look for prior experience... as in, photos with exes. Though it seems judgmental, you can definitely gain a lot of insight by seeing what a guy's ex looks like and make a rough estimate as to the type of girl he wants.
Don't underestimate the power of stalking. Facebook and Instagram are key and LinkedIn also opens the doors to one's professional existence. All platforms should be viewed before or during the "getting to know you" phase.
The information that you uncover will either deter you from moving forward and will save you time or will make you that much more excited to see things potentially heat up.
I am a firm believer that your life partner really needs to be on the same page as you in the academic sense. In my opinion, it's okay to be hypercritical when it comes to your needs.
When I date men who are not on my level, educationally-speaking, things never work out. A person's education says a lot about him.
It is one thing to be a student and get by, but it is another story when someone is or was actually passionate about his field of study and used the tools that he learned in school to help push his career forward.
This shows a certain level of motivation, determination and dedication — traits that will echo throughout different avenues of personality, as well.
Sometimes, attention and success with education directly translates to professional success. If you are a Type-A go-getter, you will be more in-step with someone who functions in the same manner.
These similar principles will also be of grave importance when it comes down to raising children with high educational values (if you wind up getting that serious).
You don't want to be the mom who makes her children complete all of their homework right after school when you're paired with a flippant Dad who lets them eat all the cookies in the cabinet while playing outside until dinner.
This may be one of the most important points of all. As the saying goes, you are judged by the company you keep. The type of people with whom an individual associates himself speaks volumes.
Are his friends bad news? Super immature? Respectful? Down to earth? Funny? Nine times out of 10, their mannerisms and thought processes reflect his true colors. Take note.
For a business-savvy woman working in the corporate world, finding the right man is like finding the right guy for the job. Stating the prerequisites for the position will result in less of a chance of him "getting fired" a month or so down the line.
Make what you want clear and be up front about for what you have zero patience and toleration. Will he stay loyal to the company (you)? Match all the criteria for which you are clandestinely looking?
Think about it this way: you would not apply for a job that you knew you would hate, get bored of or be completely uninterested in.
Sometimes, it takes time to settle on a career path that proves to be a solid fit. This is analogous to finding that special someone as well.
In the dating arena, you are your résumé. You need to sell yourself to the client or hiring manager to earn the job (relationship). Prove yourself worthy, and don't settle for anything less than the best.