Sometimes, love is kind of a jerk. It always happens when you least expect it and as soon as you’re caught off guard, it sneaks in to your life and steals your heart, like a thief in the night.
I remember a time when I was never a fan of love. Whenever I heard a woman swoon over some guy and shout it out to the world, I always rolled my eyes and wished nothing more than for her to shut up.
But then, love snagged me. One day, I couldn’t believe in all of the happily-ever-after crap, but the next day, I found myself wishing for someone with whom I could cuddle whenever I wanted.
Most girls dream about fairytales, prince charming, chivalry and being treated like Disney princesses, but I believed otherwise. It’s not that I am against that notion of what love is or how the ideal should look and seem, but I can’t help but wonder: Isn’t it such a cliché that women are the ones who get constant pampering these days?
Shouldn’t the woman take it upon herself every now and then to sweep a man off of his feet?
One thing I have learned is that a relationship is about give and... give. If you must take, make sure to take less than what you have given in the relationship. We women are conditioned to expect wooing and being pursued, since that is the acknowledged paradigm.
We should be spoiled and showered with love, but when men don’t offer that, we too quickly brand them as good for nothing.
Men are simple creatures who are not psychic; if you want something from them, you must say so. We must also recognize that they tend to speak a different love language than most women; it is something we have to understand and to which we must adjust.
We can’t keep comparing them to fictional characters from some romantic movie or novel and expect them to emulate that ideal in real life.
While plenty of men are romantics, plenty express their love differently than how movies glorify men in love. This does not not make those men less capable of loving a person, though.
We can’t just wait for men to do things for us because if we do, we’ll end up feeling frustrated. We should collectively stop expecting them to worship the ground on which we walk. If he makes you happy, maybe it’s time to turn the tables and be the female Noah Calhoun, the star character of “The Notebook.”
Start by making your man smile in your cute little ways; write him a poem or a love letter every morning before he wakes up. Send him roses or chocolates or a card just because. Let him know you are thinking about him and all the other sexy things you want to do to him later.
Surprise him with whatever romantic idea you have in mind and make his heart flutter.
Flirt with him, take him out to dinner and treat each date as if it’s the first time you are ever going out. If he’s not in the mood, don’t be sad because he turned you down.
Take it as an opportunity to make an ordinary night at home a romantic one and cook his favorite meal. Even if they don’t say it, guys appreciate it when you go out of your way to make their hearts melt.
It’s not about trying to wear the pants and completely take over the relationship. Rather, it’s a way to show your man how thankful you are that you have him in your life and that you’re together.
Spoil your man, make him happy and never make him cry. The only time you should catalyze him to shed a tear is when you are making him laugh so hard. Love him as if there’s no tomorrow.
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