Relationships

Why Women Love Bad Boys

by Gayana Sarkisova

There’s always that guy at the bar that seems to be getting all the women. He’s arrogant, rude, marches to the beat of his own drum, and may quite possibly have borderline personality disorder.

Still, women flock to him. Then there’s you; nice, funny, with a decent checking account and the undeniable fact that the only thing you’re going home with is an erection that you’re going to have to handle yourself.

You know the type-- the one that treats women like they’re replaceable while they’re waiting on line to hop into his bed. Ask any woman and she will tell you that while she does truly want a nice guy, they are seemingly impossible to find. Next thing you know, she’s falling over herself trying to chase the bad boy.

Here are the reasons women love bad boys:

Taming the beast:

This is about the thrill of the hunt, to be the confident, assertive woman she’s always wanted to be seen as and breakdown the hard exterior of the notorious bad boy. This is the game; the challenge to tame the wild man she’s just met. No other woman has been able to, but she’s special, she can rise to the occasion, she's drunk enough to find this contest amusing. There’s one thought running through her head “He’s met his match.”

Every woman wants to be the one he never saw coming. She may be the CEO of a Fortune 500, have the most amazing apartment in New York City, take off in her G5 whenever she wants, but none of these things can give her the satisfaction she will get from being the only woman powerful enough to tame the bad boy.

Every woman, no matter how confident she is has the inner desire to be able to stake their post inside the mind of a mentally unbreakable male by making him feel certain emotions he wasn't previously aware of. If she can come out of this confrontation as the boss of the two, the power trip that follows is a thrill she wishes every woman should experience at least once in their lives.

Putting her in her place:

In today’s day in age, women want men to think of them as equals. This is complete bullshit. Unless the woman is a total feminist hippie, she stills wants a manly man. One who will “put her in her place”, not let her get to crazy and walk all over him. After all, any women who knows her own personality will admit that a sense of order is what she truly needs to remain level-headed and stable.

Whether they like to admit it or not, women like to be controlled, just a little bit. This is the basis for the overwhelming qualities you can find in a bad boy that makes them so appealing to women. It’s the fantasy of being able to be dominated.

Women don’t find satisfaction of any sort in a man who acts like a little bitch (in fact, that's the farthest thing from what they want), so, they often go after men that are confident enough to make them feel like a woman.

Carnal appetite:

Contrary to popular belief women want sex … and often, probably more often than man. Yes, it’s true. To break down some more barriers, they probably don’t want the soft, cuddling, lets-make-love-and-stare-deep-into-each-others-eyes-sex. They want that dirty, throw-me-up-against-the-wall-sex.

Bad boys are unpredictable, and, in a woman’s mind, this unpredictability translates into the possibility of great, hot sex. Not knowing what kind of remark or dim-witted claim this overtly masculine figure will throw out next simply feeds the hungry, formerly bored mind of the modern woman. The danger that comes with a bad boy is a turn-on itself.

Fear of Intimacy:

The sad truth is that many women have been hurt in previous relationships. As a result, they want to avoid being put in that situation again at all costs. To do this, they must seek a man who has absolutely no interest in pursuing a meaningful relationship. A bad boy persona is the perfect match for a woman who has a fear of intimacy because in reality, neither one of them wants each other for the long haul.

Sheer Hotness:

Everyone has heard of the mental checklist women have about their perfect on paper man; career, stable, smart, funny, etc. This list is impossible to find, but we still try. When it comes to a bad boy, women look for nothing, I mean absolutely nothing aside from his physical attractiveness.

His hair is perfectly tousled, chiseled jaw line, beautiful piercing eyes, and abs that you can do your laundry on. Every woman has her perfect image of what the bad boy should look like; mine just so happens to be Brad Pitt circa Fightclub.

Adventure:

Women are much more bound to social norms than men are. Women are expected to do certain things and behave in a certain way. Bad boys embody the freedom many women crave, and they are almost immediately drawn to it.

Women often fall into routines that are not easy to break out of. Work, home, gym, repeat. When a bad boy comes along and she, in a sense, loses control when she is with him, she feels liberated now that she is thinking about how screwed up someone else is rather than herself.

Rebelling:

Bad boys are the ultimate stigma. So it’s only natural that women flock to them because they are the prime example of something you were told to stay away from. This corresponds to the aforementioned mystery that comes with bad boys, so it’s kind of like going into the unknown, going into a mental battle that to women feels like the ultimate adventure.

The more someone says you shouldn’t be doing something, or even if you know it yourself, the more it makes you want to. This dates back to Adam and Eve and the allure of the forbidden fruit. Bad boys are the living, breathing version of the forbidden fruit, and most women can’t wait to sink their teeth into them.

Gayana Sarkisova | Elite.