Samantha Jones started it all: the concept of women behaving like men in relationships. She had casual sex with no feelings involved, and loved herself more than any man (or woman- hello lesbian phase).
Even though the show ended eight years ago, women are still emulating the Sex and the City character’s behavior- in college more than anywhere.
I hear it from my friends all the time- “I don’t care if he texts me back”, “I used him, he didn’t use me”, “It was just sex, I don’t like him at all”.
Maybe in some instances these comments are true: we’ve all hooked up with that guy we are so embarrassed about we don’t even want to tell our friends it happened, or drunkenly kissed someone we genuinely have no feelings for. But I often wonder (in “Carrie” terms), if women can actually behave like men in relationships, or if they are just fooling themselves.
It’s an evolutionary fact that women are more invested in relationships than men- take any basic psychology class and you’ll learn that. Men are also praised by their friends for having sex with multiple partners, and women are scorned for it.
But it’s no longer assumed that the female in a relationship has more feelings than the male. More and more girls wear their lack of feelings as a badge of honor, using websites like “Betches Love This” as their bible for being emotionless and apathetic.
I’m not judging girls that act like this: in fact, I may or may not be one of them. But as much as my friends and I act like we don’t care, no one wants to feel like another notch on some guy’s belt.
I’m not saying we should all act like Charlotte and treat every guy we lock eyes with as our future husband, but we shouldn’t have to pretend to be Samantha to seem cool and carefree either. Carrie’s too pensive, Miranda’s too arrogant… let’s ditch Sex and the City and all just be ourselves.
Lacey Kaplan | Elite.