Simone Becchetti

4 Differences Between Being In Love And Infatuation


In my opinion, love is the moment that you look back on previous relationships and know why things didn't work out with your exes.

We've all met that person that seems have been tattooed on our subconscious after the first few dates. And after that moment, your life seems to have two phases: before and after they walked in.

Love is a beautiful feeling, but it flirts with infatuation to the point that it can become hard to distinguish between the two.

Is Mr. Amazing just saying all of the right things at the right time? Or has your heart looked past the surface of their ridiculously charming traits?

Oftentimes, what we're feeling towards this individual is not tangible. It's difficult to describe what is happening to your feelings and emotions because initially, you weren't event attracted to them to begin with.

How do you know if it's love or infatuation? Here are some indicators that should help affirm whether or not your feelings are long term.

1. Is your ego still a factor?

When you are in love, it can feel like your ego has disappeared. Love truly is honest and unconditional.

When you're in love, you're not playing games like waiting for them to text you something sentimental so you then have permission to express yourself as well.

Suddenly, showing any kind of vulnerability comes naturally and you're not afraid to be your true self. even if that means showing sadness or pain because of something the other person said to you.

2. Fights lead to growth when you're in love.

Disagreements with your significant other are inevitable. In fact, disagreements between any two people in general are likely to happen when you spend a significant amount of time together.

But instead of having these moments turn into reasons why you should break up, when you're in love, you take these opportunities as a time for growth.

When you're in love, you embrace the discomfort that comes alongside arguing and having opposing views. The desire to want to better understand your partner surpasses the desire to get your point across for the sake of being right.

Similar to point 1, your pride should never be a factor.

3. Their happiness matters no matter what happens between you two.

In life, nothing is guaranteed, not even your relationship that is currently soaring somewhere above the clouds.

I get that the idea of them ending up with someone else makes you want to sit at home in your PJs for months eating Blue Bell Vanilla Ice Cream while watching "Love Actually."

But if you're in love, you know that at your core, you want them to be happy even if that means letting them go.

Having someone in your life for selfish reasons when they could be happier dating another person is infatuation, not love.

Yes, you'd be sad if you two broke up because all relationships are painful when they end. But if you loved them, your sadness would increase tenfold once you knew the person you're in love with wasn't as happy as they could be.

4. Do you do nice things for selfish reasons?

Whether you're in love or infatuated, you will do nice things for you partner. Your intention, however, is the differentiating factor.

For example, if you're giving your partner your favorite book as a gift, is it because you want them to like the same things you do?

Or are you giving them that gift because they're an avid reader and you thought they'd enjoy it?

When you're in love, giving becomes about the other individual, even if you've never understood the Harry Potter craze.

Whatever it takes to put that smile on their face, you're all for it.