Why Victoria Beckham's 'Surprisingly Relatable' Workout Is So Not Relatable

by Sheena Sharma
Bobby Yip/Reuters

The other day, Well + Good published an article titled "Victoria Beckham's (Surprisingly Relatable) Morning Workout." In it, the site exposes Beckham's workout to the world: a daily four-mile run at 6 am. The article also championed Beckham's religious adherence to the alkaline diet, which is a diet that cuts out acid-producing foods, like alcohol, caffeine, soda, dairy, meat, sugar and salt. You know, just those seven things. Nothing else.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that waking up at the ass-crack of dawn every morning to run four miles every morning isn't relatable. What are some words I would use to describe 6 am runs? Oh, I don't know. How about "difficult"? "Unnecessary"? "Excessive"?

For those of us who are not seasoned runners or early risers, this workout is anything BUT relatable. And before you go pegging me for being lazy or lacking in discipline or what-have-you, I'd like to point out that I do, in fact, subscribe to a gym-heavy lifestyle.

But here's my issue: Do we really live in a world that shamelessly promotes four-mile runs as "normal"? I guess I'm not surprised. Rather, I'm disappointed. The average person doesn't run that much in the morning. Hell, the average person doesn't even run.

Celebrities are not just like us, so why do we keep trying to make them like us? Or is modern media trying to make us like them? Either way you look at it, it's twisted.

The article ends with the following:

"Yet again, stars are just like us. Early morning workouts? Check. Healthy, veggie-heavy diet? Check. Cute kicks? Definite check. Now all we're missing is a side of David Beckham."

Once again, a publication is putting words in our mouths. How in the hell does the life of Victoria Beckham speak for the rest of us? I don't work out in the early morning. It's a miracle if I get to the gym after 5 pm after my workday. And that bit about a healthy, veggie-heavy diet?

Who do you know whose diet is mostly vegetarian? Sure, I know vegetarians, but I have way more friends who eat meat. And I'm a 25-year-old girl who works 40 hours a week. I can't even imagine what people like my sister, who has one kid, another baby on the way and a full-time job, are thinking when they read something like this. They must feel absolutely horrible about themselves. They can't squeeze in early-morning workouts, and honestly, they shouldn't have to.

I wish Well + Good were being tongue-in-cheek about Mrs. Beckham's lifestyle, but it's not. Articles like these are the reason women turn on themselves when they can't fit into a size two. Can we please stop with them?