Relationships

These 10 Hilarious Pick-Up Lines Will Give You Dating Nightmares

by Kris Crews
HOWL

Dating isn't what it used to be.

We don't take the time to get to know each other. We have a hard time actually talking to one another because, oddly enough, social media has made us less social. Instead, we hide behind screens and DM each other instead.

Some of us have to deal with the scrub in the front seat that TLC was talking about, or that bugaboo that Destiny's Child told us about. If you've experienced that, you'd want to put their number on the call block too, to save yourself from being bothered with one-liners and pick-up lines.

But what makes a pick-up line a good one? Do most of us just think of something in our head that sounds kind of good and then try to muster the courage to say it?

Because pick-up lines can be really hit or miss. Some are hilarious; others are slightly offensive or weird. Some will make you question society or shake your faith in humanity. 

I asked my friends about some of the most extreme pick-up lines they've encountered. Their answers didn't disappoint.

1. "Girl you so fine I'd drink your dirty bath water."

...Yeahhhh that's pretty nasty.

2. "I bet you're so animalistic."

WHY would someone think that is an appropriate thing to say? Yet alone something that would turn someone on? The world is mysterious sometimes.

3. "Hey you, tall Amazonian OSU hotstuff lol what is your number because I do not have it yet."

Surprisingly, this one is actually an example of a pick-up line leading to love. They've been dating for 5 months now.

4. "I'm not usually into black girls but you just may change my mind."

For the record, this is not a good pick up line. Stay away from using this. It is hurtful and offensive to everyone.

5. [While in the grocery store in the cookie/cracker aisle]: "You look sweeter then a teddy gram."

Wait. Seriously? How do people think of these things?!

6. "Nice thighs. Can I wear them as earmuffs?"

I don't even know what this means, tbh.

7. "Do you smoke pot? Because weed be cute together"

Brownie points for the cleverness.

8. "Girl, I could make you waterfall."

Ummm that makes me uncomfortable.

9. "I could be your new religion...I could change your life."

Okay, only Jesus can do that for me. Also, where is your modesty, boy?

10. "Your butt is bouncing more than a baby kangaroo."

The only thing you can do is just laugh at this one. It's kind of hilarious.

That's all folks. Add some of these pick-up lines to your pick-up line jar if you think they'll work.  I can't guarantee that you'll win someone over, but you may make someone laugh, and hey, that's always important.