While in relationships, couples tend to view having totally separate lives as a bad sign for their future.
As with everything, there is a fine line to walk here. And this line is between emotional separation and physical separation.
But if you learn how to walk that line, the results are more rewarding than detrimental to a successful union.
Ironically, and often forgotten, space can cause more closeness than distance. This is especially true when the space takes the form of a vacation spent in warmer weather and a new bikini.
Yet, however great the trip turns out, the time apart still sends you running back into the right person's arms.
And more often than not, I come running back to my SO after a trip as a better version of myself.
I'm refreshed, excited and often somewhat sun-kissed. I tend to bring that refreshing, exciting energy into my love life when I return.
And what relationship couldn't use more of that?
As a flight attendant, I particularly have learned to navigate separation quite well. I experience separation from routines, my apartment, my bed and, of course, the men I like.
I'm constantly taking trips for work and pleasure alike. And contrary to popular belief, this hasn't been the death of any of my romances.
If anything, it makes them more stimulating, leaving us with more to talk about when we are reunited again.
I have a nomadic soul, an affinity for nowhere and free flights to anywhere in the world with my line of work.
So naturally, dating me comes with the territory that I very well may take a plane to Hawaii on a whim, sometimes alone.
It's happened before, and it's definitely not for everyone. But, I do recommend you try it before you knock it.
And you should also try dating someone with this mentality.
Distance can be very rejuvenating for most couples. Anyone in a healthy relationship will attest to the saying, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder."
And if you don't miss your lover after being away for some time, chances are, they're not "the one," and a plane ride won't make or break that.
The sooner you find that out, the better.
A healthy relationship shouldn't require constant togetherness. If it's meant to be, the time apart is only an exhibition of exactly that. And sometimes, it's a needed reminder of how much you do enjoy having someone around regularly.
It's easy to get complacent in a relationship. We get used to hearing the same person snore next to us at night, and maybe we even get annoyed by it.
Until one day, they go somewhere for a long weekend with friends, and the room is a little too quiet for you.
Suddenly, you have a realization their nasal issues have subconsciously become your sound soother.
And as their snoring deemed your white noise machine irrelevant a few months prior, you find yourself digging for that old contraption in the back of your closet.
At some point during this search, a part of you is probably regretting the last time you rolled over to tell them how annoying that same snoring had been. You probably even miss it.
But we're quick to ignore, and even entirely forget, the little things that make our significant others important to us. That is, until we're left without them for a bit.
Distance not only cultivates further fondness for your partner, but it can even crush any bad vibes you had going on your weekend getaway.
Missing someone makes the nonsense arguments you were having over where to place the couch seem less important when you're busy catching up on what happened while you were apart.
This leads me to the best part of it all, and that is having exiting stories to tell each other when you come home.
The mundane tale of the rude lady on the subway, who always takes up two seats during morning commutes, eventually becomes redundant and boring (at least to anyone with a zest for life).
Wouldn't you prefer to hear about a train ride taken in Europe instead every now and again?
When done right, and with effective communication, having experiences apart from one another only adds to the experiences you have when you are together. Things stay fresh this way, and that freshness results in passion.
On your trips taken apart, maybe you did some soul-searching, and you both discovered something new about yourselves.
Sharing your new interpersonal discoveries with each other is yet another way to grow together in the end.
In life and in relationships, it is important to not only grow together, but to also focus on continually growing on an individual level. This is something that should never change, and exploring new places is one of the most effective and interesting ways to grow.
Although easily forgotten when in a relationship, a good vacation is always a good reminder.
If you're in the right relationship, spending time apart is going to inevitably end in you appreciating the time you do spend together much more.
And growing with a new soul, your significant other, doesn't need to conclude the journey you're on within yourself.
Life is a continuous spiritual adventure to be explored individually in all phases of life and in as many different places as possible.
So, take a trip alone or with friends. And be comforted in knowing it will only add to your journey as a couple.